Face Your Fears
by demimygod35
Summary: When you have to choose the rest of your life, Kurt Hummel has some trouble. This is klaine in the Divergent world. You can read this fic even if you haven't read Divergent.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Hey guys I'm going to give you some warnings on this chapter. There are mentions of Kurt getting raped by Dave. If it will trigger anything for you then just skip that part. But anyway this is klaine in fourtis place. So when Kurt chooses he chooses Dauntless and Blaine is one of his trainers. I do not own glee or divergent. They belong to Veronica and Ryan. I'm not trying to steal anything here.**

I walked down the street slowly; motionlessly letting my mind wander. It's so hard to choose. Too have to decide what the rest of your life has in store. It's too soon. I look behind me and see a flower. I walk over to it, slowly reach down and grasp it in my hand. I feel the roots pull out of the ground as my hand rises. I bring the flower to my nose and smell it. I smile faintly at the scent that fills my nose. I place it back on the ground and think. It's kind of like me. It used to have so much hope, now it will just struggle to live. It will never be the same again, because I made a choice that will ruin that flowers life.

Tomorrow is the day I will have to choose my new life style. My new faction. The factions are split into five different categories. Abnegation: Selfless, Dauntless: Brave, Amity: Peaceful, Erudite: Intelligent, and Candor: Honesty.

This is how the society works. When teens turn sixteen, they have to choose to either stay where they were raised, or leave the nest and never turn back.

It all went downhill for me when I was eight and my mom died. She was so special to me and her face still appears in my dreams some nights. I still don't know what happened to her. One day she was there, and the next she was gone. I think my dad knows. I'll never be sure though whenever I bring it up he just pushes the subject away like nothing ever happened. He's remarried now, to a very nice lady named Carole. I have a stepbrother now, his names Finn. We were actually pretty close before they got married to so that was good.

I walk farther and farther to my house on the Abnegation compound. I open the door slowly and check to see if anyone's home. I don't see anybody so when I close the door I slump my back against it with a soft thud. I take a shaky breathe, trying to free my mind from the thoughts that have it cluttered.

My back slams against the lockers with a loud bang. A trickling pain runs up my back. I look up only to lock eyes with David Karowsky.

"You got a problem, stiff?" he asks me in a cold dead tone.

"No problem at all," I peep terrified of what he will do to me **again** if I say I have a problem.

"Good," he snarled groping my thigh after he made sure nobody was looking. I freeze dreading what he will do next. Luckily he walks away without another word. I wish I could slap the smirk he just gave me off his face. But I can't. I know exactly what he would do to me if I did. And it's horrifying.

I pick up a few books that I dropped on the floor when I was shoved. As I walk I think about the things David does to me. First he bullies me, and then he steels my first kiss, then my virginity. I didn't ask him to do it, I honestly begged him to stop, over and over again. As usual my request would be denied. After that it started happening almost every day. He doesn't even try to make less painful, he doesn't even prep me.

I snap out of my thoughts as I reach the cafeteria door. As I push the door open I see some of my friends and walk over to them. When I get there my friend Mercedes pulls me into a hug. "Hey boo," she says as she folds her arms around me in a tight embrace.

"Hey Cedes," I say giving into her strong arms. We pull back from the hug and she eyes me curiously.

"You okay?" she asks me, looking concerned for me.

I think about the question. I honestly don't know if I'm okay anymore. All my friends are bullied but not far as bad as me. The reason I'm bullied so bad is because I came out a while ago. People don't understand. Of course I'm not okay.

"I'm fine," I say. I tell people that lie almost every day. "Just scared." I conclude.

"Relax," she tells me patting my arm. I smile at her, but then my friend Rachel hugs me from behind. I look up and notice people are starting their tests. A nervous feeling builds in my stomach. When I open my mouth to start talking to Rachel, we are told to sit and be quiet.

We sit there silently for about 10 minutes, hearing people get called in for their tests. Suddenly a girl with black hair with different color streaks in it calls my name.

I take in a shaky breathe. The nervous feeling in my stomach intensifies, as I get to my feet. Finn, my stepbrother, makes eye contact with me. He mouths the words _good luck_ to me. I smile at him.

Then I turn and start walking away, towards the girl who called my name. She smiles at me and we walk into a room with mirrors covering every wall. There's a chair in the middle of the room.

"You could just take a seat in the chair," she tells me. I walk over to the chair and silently sit down. "My name is Tori I'll be doing your test today." She says. I nod. She walks up to me with a small cup with a clear liquid inside. It doesn't look like water.

"What is that?" I ask her horrified.

"It's just a serum that will knock you out for little while. But only for about two minutes, then you'll wake up and it will be over. Don't worry it's going to be okay." I nod and cautiously take the glass from her hand. It shakes a little as I take the small cup to my mouth. She nods at me to drink it. I feel my heart stop in my chest as I drink the serum. Then everything goes black.

My eyes snap open. I'm in a different room now. Everything is black and no matter where I look it's black. _Am I dead?_ I think. Then all of a sudden the lights turn on. My breathe catches in my throat as a dog appears. All I see is a knife, and on the other side of the room there is a piece of cheese. "What the actual fuck?" I say getting more nervous each time the dog steps forward, growling at me. My mind is racing with so many thoughts and my stomach twitches with terror. I don't know what to use. I don't know what's happening. I just don't know.

All of a sudden the god jumps at me. I scream and try to reach for something to help me escape. But nothing works. I lay there as the dog bites me, and pain goes through my body.

I sit up straight breathing heavy. Tori walks up to me and put her hand on my shoulder. "You okay?" She asks me.

"Are you fucking kidding me!? I was just attacked by a dog and you think I'm OKAY?! Because I'm not freaking okay! I have never been _**OKAY!**_" I yell. She stares at me wide eyed and shocked.

"I'll be right back," she says and walks out. I sit there staring at where my hands are now folded in my lap. I start to think about what I just said. I feel so bad for yelling at Tori now. She did nothing; I just needed to yell it. I'm not okay. I don't know if I ever will be. But I have to for my dad, Finn, Carole, but mostly my mom. She would always want me to pull through.

Tori walked in the room again with her head down. "Listen, I'm sorry I snapped at you I just-"she cuts me off by raising her hand. Its fine I understand, you're just stressed," she tells me. I sigh and sick down into my chair. "So here's some bad news," my eyes then shoot open.

"What do you mean bad news?" I say.

"It's nothing to bad, it's just…your test was inconclusive," she says her eyes searching mine trying to find the emotion I have hiding in them.

"What the hell does that mean?" I ask. My voice is getting louder and she puts her hand on my shoulder again.

"I need you to relax so I can explain," she pleaded. I nod and take a deep breath, calming myself. "They can't categorize you. You fit into more than faction. It's called Divergent." She explains. My stomach is twisting with nerves.

"I don't get it. What do I choose? Should I ask somebody? Am I going to be factionless?" I start spitting out random questions.

"You can't tell anybody," she says. "It's too dangerous. They can take your life." Suddenly my heart pauses in my chest. My mind is pulsing with raging thoughts. I can't even think anymore. I feel like I'm on fire from the terror intensifying inside of me.

"What is it? Why is it so dangerous? Are there other people like me?" My voice is panicky and I feel like I'm going to pass out.

"I'm sorry but our time is up," she tells me. "Just don't tell anybody," she concludes. She grabs my arm and leads me to the door. Right before I walk out she grabs my wrist and whispers "choose wisely," in my ear. I feel tears build up behind my eyes, but I don't let them fall.

"Thank you," I respond to her. She smiles and I walk away, pretending everything is okay.

Later that night I'm sitting at the table with my family eating dinner. My family is not like the other Abnegation households. For example we goof off a little and talk when we want to talk. But tonight everything feels different. Nobody is talking. It's completely silent. But suddenly my dad clears his throat.

"So boys how did your test go?" he asks us. I freeze.

"Dad! We can't tell you what the test said." I say to him sternly and nervous. He looks at me weird, like he knows something's up.

"I wasn't asking what you got, I just wanted to know if they went okay," he says defensively.

"It was fine," I say slamming my fork on the table. "Can I be excused please?" I ask infuriated.

"Fine," my dad says. As I walk away I feel there gazes on me. So I walk up to my room faster. I close the door and lay my back on it, as the tears I've been holding in, slowly roll down my cheeks silently. A sob is torn from my throat as I think more and more about how screwed up my life is. _Why do I always suffer?_ I think to myself. _Why me? Why am I such a failure? Why can't I just be normal like everyone else?_

More tears roll down my cheeks at a fast pace. I decide to cope with this the only way I know how. I start to sing.

_It's probably what's best for you_

_I only want the best for you _

_And if it's not the best then you're stuck_

I feel my heart pound and more tears escape as I reach the chorus.

_But baby I just ran out of band-aids_

_I don't even know where to start_

_Cause you can bandage the damage_

_But you never really can fix a heart_

I stop singing when I feel calm and walk over to my nightstand. I reach inside and take out a picture of me and my mom, and her old perfume bottle. I lift it to my nose and frown. The smell if fading. A silent tear makes its way down my face, and drips on the picture I'm holding of us. It's the only picture we have of me and her. I feel like all the memories I have of her are now gone. I just feel so empty.

In the picture I can't be any older than four, and I'm in my mom's arms. I study her blue eyes, pale skin, and light brown hair. She looks just like me.

I put the perfume bottle back in my drawer, but keep the picture in my hand. I slowly make my way over to the bed. I put the picture under my pillow and feel the warm wet tacks trailing down my pale cheeks. I lay there and cry silently until I fall asleep.

A knock on my door awakes me from my sleep. "Kurt? Buddy can I come in?" I hear my dad say on the other side of the door.

"Yeah," I mumble loud enough so he could hear me but I didn't have to move my face out of the pillow I have my face stuffed in. I hear the door open and my dad steps in.

"Hey bud, you okay?" he asks me sitting at the foot of my bed.

I look's up and my dad makes a pained face. I know I have tears staining my face, and it's probably super red.

"Dad, I'm scared," I whisper looking up and making eye contact with him. Pressure builds behind my eyes and next thing I know I'm crying again. My dad scoots over to me and takes me in his arms. I sob quietly into his chest as he runs his hand through my hair. When my sobs slow down and the tears start to stop, we break apart.

"Bud," my dad says. "I don't want you to be scared, or sad. You know you can come to me for anything right?" he asks me.

"Of course I know that dad," I answer. "I just don't want to lose you. I'm so afraid that I'll lose you just like I lost mom. I won't be able to take that pain for long. I need you, dad. I know this makes me sound pathetic but, you're my best friend. You always will be," I mumble that last sentence right before another sob was torn from my throat and I throw my arms around him. "Please never leave me," I plead into his ear.

He grips my back tightly before whispering the promise I've almost wanted him to promise me. "You're not going to lose me."

We lay there for about 2 hours talking for a while, till us both fell asleep.

I slowly peel my eyes open. The first thought I have is that today is the choosing ceremony. I look at the clock and see that its 6:25. I role out of bed to shower and get dressed. When I finish getting ready I walk down the stairs and say good morning to everybody. I kiss my dad on the head, and he smiles at me.

"Okay everybody," Carole says. "Eat up quick, we can't be late." I sit down and have some pancakes. Right when we finish we walk to the ceremony. When we arrive we take our seats, and wait silently with everyone else. I look around and see all the other factions sitting around us. Then Jeanine Matthews walks out. Jeanine is the leader of the Erudite.

"Hello everybody," she says. "Today we will see these teens, find out the rest of their life. This is a very big choice, and it is not something to fool with. Your new faction is your new way of life. Choose wisely," she concludes. She walks off the stage and names are called randomly. When Finn's name is called, he decides to stay with Abnegation. So I watch as some of my friends choose.

Quinn chooses Erudite, and so does Brittany. Rachel chooses Amity. After Rachel chooses my name is called. I take a shaky breathe and walk over to the bowls. I stare at the different bowls in front of me. I think about what to do as I feel everybody's eyes on me. I pick up the blade and try and decide what to do. I don't have much time. I want to scream. But before I know what I'm doing, I slice my palm open and drip my blood into Dauntless.

The brave.

**AN: So did you like it? Please review and tell me what you think. And please be nice!**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Hey lovely readers **** So thanks for reading this story so far and I won't be updating very fast because report cards are coming out and I'm really stressed out :/ Plus I don't have much time because I started watching Once Upon A Time and I can't stop watching! Anyway here's chapter 2!**

I feel shocked at what I just did. I have one hundred different thoughts zooming through my head. There's relief, terror, and sadness. My thoughts stop as a man walks over to me and starts leading me out.

The last thing I do before I exit is look at my parents. Carole gives me a little smile and wave. But my dad…he just sits there with a straight face. Tears look like they're about to fall from his eyes. I mouth two words to him. _I'm sorry._ He looks away with I pained expression. That's the last time I see him.

I'm put in a line with other dauntless initiates. I stand outside with other initiates. It sounds like there are trains coming. I stand there, nervous and shaky as terror fills my body and plays with my mind. I hear someone shouting my name. I look up and see Noah Puckerman, and Santana Lopez approaching me with grins on their faces. I open my arms and throw myself into their arms. _I won't have to go through this alone, _I think.

"So Hummel," Puck starts saying. "You're going to learn to be brave huh?" he asks me amused.

I think about what he said. _Am I brave? _I think to myself. My mind twists with different kind of acts of bravery. I haven't done any. _I can be remade here_, I tell myself in my mind again. "I always have been Puckerman. I just never had the chance to show it," I say satisfied with myself. Santana smirks at me. She opens her mouth to say something but Puck cuts her off.

"The other dauntless initiates are jumping!" he exclaims pointing at a train zooming by as the initiates jumped on. Before I know what I'm doing, I rush towards the train as the air slid by my face as my speed increased. I don't look behind. I don't want to see who's following me. I don't want to see the dark past I'm leaving behind. Then, I jump. I feel wind blowing around me, and in that second, I feel free.

Suddenly my feet hit the ground and I no longer feel free. I feel like Kurt.

"Wow," I hear Puck breathe out behind me, trying to catch his breath. "That was exhilarating!" he shouted as his eyes lit up like an excited puppy.

"You think!" shouts Santana. She walks up behind me and puts her hand on my shoulder. "You alright Hummel?" she asks me.

I smile. For the first time I feel like Kurt. But a happy Kurt, who will leave his past behind. "I'm great," I assure her, my smile getting wider.

We all look at each other. Then I turn to take in my surroundings. We landed on a roof and there are dauntless initiates gathered around chatting with the people they know. Suddenly somebody trips and falls on me. I turn around very fast.

"Are you okay?" I ask the girl wearing candor clothes and short brown hair.

"Yeah I'm fine," she tells me. "I'm really sorry I just wasn't looking where I was going."

I smile at her. "It's fine," I state. "What's your name?" I question her.

"My names Christina," she tells me with a smile. "You?" she asks.

"My names Kurt," I say. I open my mouth to say something but Puck touches my shoulder and turns me around.

"Look!" he says and points the ledge of the building. There is a boy with brown hair and candor clothing. He suddenly jumps off the roof. My breathe catches in my throat as me and the other new initiates gather around the ledge and look down. Then a voice over speakers announces "First jumper, Peter!"

My mind goes blank. I feel my body be pulled closer to the edge as I climb on top of it. "Kurt are you kidding me?" Santana hisses. But I don't listen. I feel wind blow over my ears and the whistle it creates in my head. Then I put my arms out, close my eyes, and jump.

I feel my body cut through the wind, adrenaline pumping through my veins. I feel relief and free as I fall. It feels like years as my body cuts through the earth and I keep falling. _Freedom_, I think to myself as relief spreads through my body. Suddenly I hit a net and bounce lightly as my body makes the contact.

"Wow," I breathe out. Then somebody tugs the net and I bounce to the side. My eyes lock with the most beautiful hazel eyes I had ever seen. The eyes burn into my mind as I feel something I never felt before as the man pulls me off the net.

I land on the ground in front of him. I take in his whole body now. He's short but skinny and has black curly untamed hair. His skin is not completely white but vaguely tanned. He is wearing black skin tight jeans, leather boots, and a black jean jacket.

"What's your name, stiff," he asks me. A smirk tugs on his lips.

"It's Kurt," I tell him trying to act as confident as possible to make good impressions.

"Welcome to dauntless," he says making eye contact with me. _Hot_ _damn_, I think to myself.

Then a boy and a girl escort me to a cafeteria. The only person sitting there, with a cocky grin on his face is Peter, the first jumper. _Not another douche bag_ I think.

I walk to a different table and sit silently. I keep looking to see if Santana or Puck will enter because I feel like a loser. Finally Santana enters the cafeteria. I can tell her hair has been blowing because it's a little messed up. There four other people in the cafeteria at the moment she gets to me. I jump up and hug her and she smiles at me when we pull apart.

"I can't wait to ditch these," she says poking at her gray abnegation clothing.

I laugh. "I know right?" I reply.

We sit and chat quietly for about a minute till Puck comes in. He walks over and sits next to us.

We make small talk about various topics as the other initiates file in. Christina comes in and introduces us to her friend Will. Will has very short brown hair and light brown eyes, and pale skin.

"It's nice to meet you guys," he says, smiling bright at us.

"Right back at you," says Puck. We all sit down and learn more about each other. We stop talking when somebody taps on a microphone.

I look up and see a man with pale skin and tattoos and piercings all over. He has dirty blonde hair that stays away from his eyes.

"Welcome initiates," he says. "My name is Eric and I am one of your two trainers. I have a few things to say before anyone does anything I need to say a few things. Dauntless is not about being stupid and goofing off. It's about brave acts for you and for other people." He states. Then the man who pulled me off the net enters. Eric gives him the microphone.

"Welcome everybody. My name is Blaine and I am your other trainer," he says. "I'm guessing Eric already gave you guys a speech so I'm not going to. Anyway follow us on a tour of the compound," He instructs us.

We get up and follow Blaine and Eric around the compound listening to the different rooms and what happens in them. It wasn't until I turned around that I saw him. He's standing there with Peter and two other people. One of them is the girl that jumped second, but the other is some boy I'd never seen before. David Karowsky. I take in a terrified breathe. I thought I could leave everything behind, and move on. I was going to be recreated. But I can't now. But things will be different, and I'm no longer letting him push me around. _I'm not selfless anymore_ I tell myself. _I am brave._

David sees me then staring at him. He gives a smirk of pride. _He thinks he can push me around? Well think again. _I send back my best bitch glare and turn back around to listen to Eric speak. When Puck notices what I was watching he puts a hand protectively on my shoulder. I give him a smile and mouth the words thank you.

When the tour concludes we are told to go eat dinner in the cafeteria. When we arrive, Puck, Christina, Santana, Will and I all sit together at a table and make small talk. A boy and two girls walk's up behind Puck and taps his shoulder.

"Hey, my names Uriah and these are my friends Lynn and Marlene. Mind if we join you?" asks the boy.

Puck smirks and reaches his hand out to shake with Uriah. "The names Puck," he says. The three of them take a seat next to Puck. "This is my crew," he tells them. I crack a smile and reach across the table to lightly punch his arm. We all laugh and Puck tells them our names. We all sit and eat our food silently.

"So are you guys all dauntless born initiates?" I ask them, letting my curiosity get the best of me.

"In the flesh," says Uriah with a cocky grin. We sit there and chat as time fly's by us till we release its 9:00. We all walk to the dorms in silence and I share a bunk with Puck. As we all sit on our beds and chat, the second crew comes in. The one that consists of Peter and David. I take in a shuddery breathe. Puck and Santana's jaws tighten in anger.

"Sup," says Peter. "Sense were all initiates I think I should tell you to stay out of my way and we won't have a problem," he orders.

"Wow what a cocky douche we have here," Says Puck. "No wonder you're all buddy buddy with Karowsky," he states.

"Watch it Puckerman," Karowsky snarls.

Then Puck screams, Santana screams, and everybody screams. I jump off the top of my bed when Puck lunges at David. I push them apart and scream, "Shut the fuck up! Dauntless is about being brave not douche bags so both of you, get over the feud you have now before you make each other's lives miserable!" I conclude.

"Coming from you Hummel," Puck says. "This douche has made your life a living hell, and you going to forgive him?" He asks.

"I'm not forgiving anybody. But I'm not going to fight with him like a five year old would," I say raising my voice. Then Eric storms in.

"What's up with all the shouting?" he asks us.

"Nothing," I mumble. "We were just going to be," I tell him giving David and Puck glares as I climb to the top bunk.

Eric gives us all skeptical looks. "Training starts tomorrow," he tells us. "Wrest up," he finishes before walking out.

It's silent as everybody leaves the room to change and slip into bed. We all sit there till we drift off to sleep one by one. Sleep doesn't seem to find me, so I lay there lost in my own thoughts. After an hour goes by I decide I need to occupy my mind. So I get up and softly walk out of the dorm.

I walk around the stony hallways and hum to myself as I walk. I creep into the cafeteria and make coffee and slowly drink it. When I'm half finished I decide to walk a bit more. I get my cup and lead myself back into the cold hallways. After about ten minutes of walking somebody clears their throat behind me. I jump around quickly and bit my lip when I see Blaine standing there.

"What are you doing up?" he asks me, his eyebrows knitting together. I can't tell if there's confusion or anger in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry," I say to him before I start rambling. "I couldn't sleep because I couldn't stop thinking and I lay in bed for an hour and decided to make some coffee and I-I- I'm just going to go to bed," I mumble turning quickly.

"Wait!" he calls to me. My breathe catches in my throat and I turn around biting my lip. "It's fine. You're not in trouble I couldn't sleep either," he explains to me.

"Yeah," is all I can bring myself to say. He laughs a little.

"You do realize you don't have to scared around me right?" he asks. "Eric is kind of the mean one. But that stays between us," he says and laughs.

I smile at him and a small giggle escapes my throat. "I really think I should go to bed right now though," I tell him with a smile.

"Come on," he says walking in front of me a little. "I'll bring you back. Oh, and if you're going to go to bed, it probably wasn't the best idea to get coffee."

"Yeah I think I just noticed that," I reply with a nervous laugh. Then we walk in silence and I turn my head slightly to look at him. He's wearing a similar outfit to mine. He's wearing a black skin tight muscle shirt (that shows of his arms and chest great) and loose sweatpants that hang low on his waist. I'm wearing baggie black t-shirt because the insecurity I have about my body. His hair is a little curlier than it was this morning and he looks like an actual puppy.

_Stop thinking about him that way_ I hear my mind tell me. But of course I don't listen. We slowly approach the dorm and when we do and I start to walk in Blaine grabs my arm. "It's Kurt, right?" he asks me.

I smile. "Yeah," I mumble and smile slightly. We lock eyes quick and I can feel his hazel orbs burning into my mind. He steps forward and brushes a little bit of coffee off the side of my lip.

"Goodnight, Kurt," he tells me and turns and walks away leaving me alone.

"Wow," I whisper to myself before tiptoeing to my bunk, and laying down with the thought of Blaine on my mind.

**AN: Review and tell me some of the stuff you would like to see and maybe some good and bad feedback but please be nice! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

My eyes snap open when Eric comes into our dorm and wakes everybody. "Initiates," he says. "Wake up. It's time for your first day of training. Get to the cafeteria to eat and we will explain more on further notice," he concludes before exiting.

I sit up and rub my eyes looking around as everybody sits up and starts to move slowly. Puck sits up and stands up toward my bunk. "Come on Hummel," he says pulling my arm lightly.

"I'm coming," I tell him laughing slightly at his excitement. I climb down the ladder and Santana and Christina walk up to us.

We say hi and leave to get changed, and showered. Santana and Christina go their separate ways to get ready and Will, Puck and I all walk to the boys. We hop in the stalls shower and change and when were finished we all walk to the cafeteria. We chat about what we think training will be like but I can't stop thinking about how tired I am. When I fell asleep it was around four in the morning. I also zone out and let my mind think about the encounter with Blaine.

He seemed so sweet and funny, unlike Eric. He reminded me of somebody humble and generous but also very sexy at the same time. But I can't think of anyone who fits that description other then Blaine.

When we open the doors to the cafeteria Christina and Santana are sitting at a table with a boy I had never seen before. Puck, Uriah, Will and I all look at each other with our eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

When we get to the table and I sit next to Santana, Uriah sits beside me. Will sits next to Christina and Puck sits beside him. "This is me and Christina's new friend Al," she tells us smiling at him.

I look at him and smile. "My names Kurt," I say being the polite person I am. He shakes back and we all introduce ourselves and start discussing the cake we were eating.

"This is so good!" Puck shouts through the pile of cake he had just shoved in his mouth. We all laugh at him and I immediately zone out when Blaine walks in the room. He's freshly showered and a little bead of water dripping down his chest and dissolving into the neck of the tight black t-shirt he's wearing. He looks up and notices I'm looking at him so I look away immediately as a brush spreads across my pale cheeks. When I turn to the conversation all six of my friends were staring at me. When Lynn and Marlene walk up and sit behind Uriah they question.

"Why is everybody staring at Kurt?" Marlene asks with a puzzled expression.

"I honestly have no idea," I reply to her. Santana cracks a smile and pushes my shoulder.

"You were totally checking Blaine out. You to eye fucked for like point five seconds. My eyes go wide and I try not to look like a deer caught in headlights.

"I-I was not!" I exclaim raising my voice getting defensive. "I was just…looking at the clock," I conclude looking satisfied with the excuse.

They all stare at me again, but with amused expressions. "Hummel," Puck cuts in. "There's no clock there," he tells me pointing to the wall I had claimed to see a clock on.

I open my mouth but right as I do, Blaine comes up behind me and Santana but only puts a hand on my shoulder. "Everything okay over here?" he asks us.

I blush a crimson red, and sit there with my shoulders locked and staring at the table. Everybody at the table bursts out into laughter.

"Hahaha very funny," I say giving them death glares. They all laugh harder and Blaine whispers "do I even want to know?" in my ear.

"Yes!" Puck screeches laughing. All their faces are beat red and Santana looks like she's going to cry from laughter.

"No!" I shout. I feel Blaine's breathe on the back of my neck and I feel all the energy in me spike.

Puck obviously notices because he starts laughing extra hard. I can't help but join in then because Puck's about to choke on cake.

"But yeah everything's fine," Santana tells Blaine when she can breathe again.

Blaine laughs slightly at us before walking away. "Kurt you so like him!" Puck shouts.

"Shut it Puckerman!" I snap. "Keep your voice down," I order him.

"Fine, I'll keep my voice down if you admit you like him," he says with a cocky grin on his face.

"I'm resisting the urge to come punch you in the face right now," I say glaring daggers at him. Everybody at the table all laughs lightly at us. "He is cute, but I don't have a crush on him. He is attractive but that would be a little inappropriate," I explain. Puck looks at me unconvincingly but lets it slide when Eric enters and orders for everybody's attention.

"Alright initiates. Today you will start your training here in the dauntless compound. We ask for you to follow me and Blaine to the training part of the compound." Eric tells us gesturing for us to follow him and Blaine. We get up and throw our garbage away following the two trainers down the rocky corridors. When we arrive it looks just like the rest of the compound but with training equipment.

There are punching bags, and mats set up as I scan the room with my eyes. Eric walks and sits a stone and gestures for Blaine to take control of the situation. "There are many processes of training here in dauntless. The first type is physical. You will fight, and learn how to fight," he explains. I listen intently feeling nerves build all in my body. "Everybody choose a punching bag," he instructs. I get a punching bag farther to the end of the room and Santana and puck take the two on the left and right side of me.

Christina goes on the right side of Santana and everybody else piles in next to Puck. Blaine orders us to start punching and kicking and we do. Every time my fist connects with the bag I feel a rush go through my body. I bring my leg up and kick the bag twice, before spinning and punching one more time.

"Wow," Puck says shocked next to me. "Nice one Hummel," He says playfully punching my shoulder. I laugh and reply in a sassy manner.

"Not so bad yourself Puckerman." Suddenly Blaine makes his way over and stands in the middle of me and Puck. Puck smiles and I roll my eyes at him.

"That was pretty impressive Kurt," he tells me. I smile let confidence take over my body.

"I know," I reply with a cocky smirk, teasing him. The side of Blaine's mouth twitches up in a half smile.

"Not so fast though," he tells me. He pushes me away lightly and brings both feet off the ground before kicking the bag spinning and punching it. "You have to lock your muscles," he orders.

He moves me in front of the punching bag before telling me to try. "How?" I ask him. Suddenly he positions himself behind me and wraps his hands around my forearms and slowly moves them towards the bag. When both my fists connected with the punching bag he release but moves his hand the bottom of thigh. His breathe is ghosting over the back of my neck making everything freeze. "You have to move the leg faster, but not too fast. You have to make sure that you don't lose focus on your target," he whispers into my ear.

When he moves in front of me I clear my throat and mumble "Okay," before doing what he showed me.

"Now you got it," he tells me and pats my back before walking away. I look too Santana my mouth dropping open.

"Wanky," she says with a laugh in her voice. I then turn to Puck his jaw is dangling open and when I look behind him I see Uriah, Lynn, Marlene, Al, and Will are all looking at me the same way.

"What the hell?" I whisper. Puck starts to laugh and when I turn I see Karowsky sending me death glares across the room. I give him a cocky smirk before whipping my head back around and continue to punch the bag.

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Later that night me Lynn, Uriah, and Marlene are all sitting in the rooms together chatting about how training went. Everybody comes walking in and gets into bed. "Hey man, have you talked to Blaine yet?" he asks me with a cocky smirk.

"Shut it Puckerman or I will smack that smirk right off you face," I tell him before sending him the best bitch glare I can muster. "Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to the bathroom," I explain before cutting out of the room quickly. I walk down a few stony hallways before coming up to the bathroom. I go inside before going in a stall. When I'm finished I leave the stall. When I get out of the stall I'm shoved up against a wall before strong hears are all over my body.

I try to scream but it's silenced when lips are shoved against mine and a tongue enters my mouth. I panic knowing its Dave but I can't move. My hands are pinned to the side of me and I'm completely defenseless. I silent scream escapes my throat has his hands travel to the belt I'm wearing. I struggle in his hold as a tear makes its way down my check.

He removes his mouth from mine and kisses down my neck. "Please stop!" I yell trying to shove him off me. He's too strong for me though.

"Shut it Hummel," he snaps wrapping his hand around my neck tightly.

Suddenly I can't breathe. "Help," I whimper in a soft voice. I start to see black spots then his knee connects with my stomach. He gets of me and punches me and I fall to the floor as I feel a sharp pain go down my spine. He kicks my back a few more times and my head was pounding. "Stop! Please!" I yell sobbing.

Suddenly somebody shoves his body away from mine. All I hear is a yell and a fist connects with a face, before everything goes black.

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I sit up and scream my eyes bolting open from the nightmare. My head pounds and I hiss as a pain goes up my back. It's dark and I hear movement then the light flickers on. Tears run down my face and Blaine rushes over to me putting a hand on my back.

I'm sitting on a queen sized mattress in a tiny room. I see blankets lying on the floor with a pillow. Blaine must have let me have his bed. Was he the one who puncher Dave when I passed out?

My sobs start to die down and I slowly remove my head from his shoulder. "Here sit up a bit more," he says breaking the silence and moving my body up the bed slightly till my back is pressed against the pillows. I hiss in pain as my back connects with the soft object. My head pounds a bit more and I moan in pain again. I feel Blaine got off the bed as my eyes slip shut. He returns with a heating pack and an icepack.

"Sit up a little bit," he instructs me putting a hand on my back guiding me to sit up. I groan again but my back is quickly filled with warmth the second I lean back. He presses the ice pack on the left side of my face that is obviously bruising.

We sit in silence as he tends to my face with the icepack. "What happened?" I ask him, concerned about what could've happened to Dave after I passed out.

"Well, Dave is in the infirmary getting stitches on his cheek, and well I told Eric what happened and he said you could be excused from training later," he explains to me. I look at the clock and see that it's 3:30 in the morning.

"Thank you," I whisper. I look up and his eyes lock with mine. He smiles.

"You really don't have to thank me," he says. I laugh a little. He looks at me confused about why I would laugh at that.

"Of course I have to thank you," I tell him. "You did what I haven't had the courage to do in four years," I explain to him.

"You could do it," he says. "What you have to do is go really deep and find the courage you have."

"I don't have courage," I tell him. "I probably won't even survive it here in dauntless. I'm such an idiot," I say brining my palm to rest on my forehead.

"Why would you say that?" he asks me. I look at him confused at why he keeps prying.

"Well the second I chose dauntless I knew it was a mistake. I should've just stayed the stiff I always will be," I explain disappointed in myself. He slowly brings the icepack away from my face.

"Everybody has courage, Kurt. You just have to find it. I would know that more than anybody," he says trying to make me feel better. "What was that nightmare about?" He asks, prying again.

"I'm sorry but I don't feel comfortable explaining that to somebody I barely know," I snap at him. He looks hurt after I snap. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap it's just that-well-Ugh," I say throwing my head day and instantly regretting it.

He moves quickly and puts the icepack on my neck. Mt head clutters with thoughts of the first time it happened. My first time. He took everything from me and I'm not longer sad or feeling sorry for myself.

I'm angry. Nobody can push me around anymore. I'm the new Kurt. Brave and strong and nobody will change it.

"Kurt," Blaine says. "I'm sorry I pried and I won't do it again. Just close your eyes and don't think for a little. You obviously need it," he explains in a reassuring voice.

"Okay," I whisper laying my head down and closes my eyes before letting sleep takeover my body and Blaine's strong and caring arms are wrapped around me bringing my body tight to his chest.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I wake to the sound of a beating heart in my ear. I don't know why but I smiled and buried my face deeper into Blaine's chest. _Wait a second. Blaine!? _I think to myself my eyes shooting open. When I look up his amber eyes are looking at me and he has one arm outstretched behind his head.

"You sleep well?" he asks me clearly concerned. I think about how after I went to sleep in Blaine's arms I felt so safe and connected. No nightmares. I smile before responding with a simple nod. "Good," he says. I guess that he feels the awkward tension between in the situation.

I move off him wincing at the pain. "I feel better than I did before," I tell him. I could see that he was about to ask me if I felt better just by the way his lips parted and eyes changed to more of a concerned expression.

He nodded and we slipped into silence. "I'm going to go shower really quick," he tells me. "Do you want anything?" he asks me.

I hesitate. "I'm good thanks," I say. He walks into his bathroom awkwardly and I lie back on the bed and grin when the door closes.

_ Why do I always feel like this around him? _ I ask myself in my head as my mind filled thoughts of me and Blaine. Not just Blaine, but us together as one. "Damn it," I whisper to myself as I feel my head slip into a caring feeling I never felt before. My feelings keep developing more and more and I don't know if it's good or bad.

I lay there for about five more long minutes before giving up and having to go to the bathroom. I get up and hesitate at the bathroom door. I take a shaky breathe before building the courage to knock. I stop right before I knock because Blaine starts to sing.

_When the days are cold_

_And the cards all fold_

_And the saints we see _

_Are all made of gold_

_When your dreams all fail_

_And the ones we hale_

_Are the worst of all_

_And the blood's run stale_

_I wanna hide the truth_

_I wanna shelter you_

_But with the beast inside_

_There's nowhere we can hide_

_No matter what we breed _

_We still are made of greed_

_This is my kingdom come_

_This is my kingdom come_

I feel my heart stop at his beautiful voice and the way it flows out of him at the chorus.

_When you feel my heat_

_Look into my eyes _

_It's where my demons hide_

_It's where my demons hide_

_Don't get to close_

_Its dark inside_

_It's where my demons hide_

_It's where my demons hide_

I snap myself out of the trance Blaine's voice put me in as I quickly walk back to the bed. If I thought he was attractive before this makes him better.

I get the courage again to actually knock. "Blaine I have to go to the bathroom," I yell nervous as I twiddle my thumbs as they dangle by my side.

"Come in," he yells back. I open the door to the steamy bathroom and say thanks. When I'm finished I start washing my hands when the water in the shower stops. I look up and Blaine reaches out and grabs a towel before pulling it into the shower. After about ten seconds the shower curtain opens and Blaine steps out with the towel tied loosely around his hips. My breath catches in my throat and I quickly look down at my hands and bite my lip.

He grabs a second towel and that's when my eyes wonder. His skin is a tan color that's not very dark and his chest is very stiff and muscular. There's a little trail of hair that leads under the towel. His back is turned to me as he dries his face and dark untamed curly hair. As he lifts his arms to dry his hair his muscles flex and water drip's to a spot on the line of the towel where it's loosely hanging on his hips.

Thoughts of his body on top if mine as we kiss and I fist my hand in his hair plague my mind. He turns around and I turn my head away as fast as possible. I hear him chuckle before he walks up next to me and grabs a toothbrush. "I'm just going to go back into the other room," I whimper lowly and awkwardly before walking quickly out of the room and closing the door behind me.

I walk over to the bed and sit there, my eyes wide as I feel my pants get tighter. "Shit," I mumble "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck," I mumble to myself. I hear more movement in the bathroom and Blaine moves towards the door. I jump under the covers softly seeing as though my body is still sore. I hiss in pain at the quick movement but settle just in time when Blaine comes out.

His hair is damp and little beads of water still drip down his neck and into the neck of his tight black muscle shirt. The shirt clings to his body in all the right places and shows off his broad chest. "So-um, what am I going to do today?" I ask him trying to think of something else.

He thinks for a minute then comes and sits on the edge of the bed. "You could just stay in here or if you want to, go to breakfast," he says. I open my mouth but he cuts me off. "But Eric said you should stay off training for a day."

I think for a minute, and then I remember the pack I made with myself. To be brave and to face my fears with a new level of confidence and courage. "I'm going to go to breakfast," I tell him and nod as I say it, feeling proud of myself for once.

"Alright then," he says. I study his face for a minute. He never shows his emotions it seems like he's too scared to.

"I'm just going to do my hair," I tell him before quickly cutting out of the room. I close the door with a soft click and walk to the mirror.

I study my face. Something about me seems…different. I feel like a new person. I even _look_ like a new person. Angry and a little more brave. Something nobody will ever be allowed to take away from me ever again.

On the abnegation compound I was barely allowed to look in mirrors often. There is only about one mirror in every abnegation home. I pick up a brush and push my hair back. I get aggravated on how to style my hair and Blaine comes in.

He chuckles softly. "Want some help?" he asks me with a cocky smirk. My jaw tightens and I breathe in to keep from snapping at him again.

"Sure," I say containing myself. He walks over to me and has me look in the mirror to see everything he does. First he brushes my hair up and quickly hairsprays it up so there is a perfect little flip at the front.

I turn around quickly and realize how close are faces are. "Thanks," I mumble breathe catching in my throat as his hips push against mine.

"No problem," he whispers back. Our faces get closer and I snap myself out of it. _If you love, it will just end in tears_, I say to myself in my head.

I then move myself out from behind and walking quickly out of the room with a little limp.

"Shit," I whisper to myself as I feel myself falling for the beautiful amber eyed Blaine.


	4. Chapter 4

I feel nervous as I keep walking down the hallway and getting closer to the cafeteria. I take many shaky breathes as my hand grasps the door handle. I feel my wrist move as I gently turn it before quickly opening it. When I step in I feel like everybody's staring at me.

I duck my head down and rush over to my friends. I sit next to Santana and bury my head in my hands as my mind starts to get cluttered, and I feel as if there are a million lightning bolts clashing around in my head like a never ending storm. "What happened last night?" Puck asks me clearly concerned.

"It's none of your business Puckerman. Not like you even care," I say whispering the last part. His eyebrows knit together in confusion.

"Hummel if I didn't care, I wouldn't have asked. So I obviously care what happened. I thought you and me were kind of bros you know?" he says. I take my head out of my hands and look at him. I stare at him for a minute and then realize he's being serious.

"I-um-I had a run in with Karowsky," I tell them all. Some of them look at me confused, but Santana and Puck's facial expressions show the rage that was intensifying inside them. "But I'm fine, so let's not attack him when he comes back or _ever_," I explain putting extra emphasis on the word ever.

"He can't just do that!" Santana screeches. "The next time I see him I'm going to shove my foot so far up his!-""Santana!"

I shout interrupting her. "As I said before its really no big deal. I'm fine, your fine he may not be fine, but who the fuck cares?" I say.

Then Uriah pipes up from across the table where he's seated next to Puck. "What do you mean he may not be fine?" he asks.

I bite my lip debating on what to tell them. "Well," I say hesitating before I explain everything. "He beat me up, then Blaine came in and may or may not have beet the living crap out of him," I say the last part rushing through the sentence.

Uriah's jaw drops. Before he says anything Santana gets out a quick "wanky" before Uriah opens his mouth. I send her an icy glare as Uriah starts to talk.

"So what after?" he asks dying to hear more.

"It's not that big of a deal. He told Eric and then moved me to his room for the night," I say regretting the last part.

Everybody's hand clasps over their jaw. Christina then jumps in. "You were in his room? Alone? With a bed? For a whole night?" she asks the questions rapidly.

"Guys seriously? He may be cute but that's kind of inappropriate seeing as though he's my trainer," I say to them trying not to think about what happened after he had done my hair for me.

"Whatever Hummel," Puck says. "But we both know you want to tap that."

I reach over the table and slap his arm lightly. Then everyone at the table burst out laughing. Santana shoves her face on my shoulder and laughs hysterically and harder than anyone at the table.

"San relax," I tell her still catching my breath. "Plus even though I like him I doubt he even likes me the slightest bit,"

"Hummel, that's probably because you _look_ like a stiff," he tells me putting extra emphasis on the word look.

I throw him a hurt look before commenting. "I do NOT look like a stiff."

"Sorry Hummel. But you do," he says. His face lights up and it looks like he has an idea.

"Puckerman get that look off your face. Whatever idea you have it's probably stupid as usual," I snarl at him.

"I was suggesting we take you on down to the tattoo parlor. I got one with Uriah last night," he says looking pleased with himself.

"Wait hold up," I say. "You and Uriah got tattoos together?"

"Yes we did," Puck says flashing a smile at him. He pulls up the short sleeve on his black tight t-shirt. I look and all I see is the dauntless symbol.

"Seriously? That is the most common tattoo anybody in any faction would get. The symbol of their faction. Dauntless' symbol is fire representing bravery, abnegation is two hands holding onto each other symbolizing selflessness, candor is a scale symbolizing truth over lies, amity is a tree representing gardens and peace, and erudite is an eye representing intelligence.

"Yes seriously," Uriah cuts in. "Plus it gives me a chance to show off my guns to the ladies," he says arching his eyebrows and rolling his sleeve up to flex his muscles.

"You have got to be kidding me," I say face paling myself. Uriah shoves me slightly and we laugh. "Fine, later tonight after dinner we'll get me a dauntless tattoo."

Puck and Uriah shout and high five in victory. Everybody else laughs at how enthusiastic they are. I take a minute to turn around. David is throwing his stuff away with a limp and his cheek is bruised very badly. We make eye contact before I whip my head back around.

Soon Eric comes in and takes us to training. We walk down the hallways together until we stop at the room with all the equipment. "Today you guys will fight each other. We have chosen who will fight who," Eric tells us. Everybody gets super excited and we start to run into training. Eric grabs my arm and Blaine stands next to him.

"Sorry Kurt but you're way to hurt for training," Eric says. I suddenly begin to protest but Eric cuts me off.

"That's it Kurt," Blaine cuts in. "Follow me," he says. "I'll keep him busy Eric don't worry. Go watch the initiates before somebody loses an eye."

Eric walks off and Blaine nods his head for me to follow him. "Where are we going?" I ask him as we come to the edge of the roaring chasm.

"Nothing," Blaine tells me. "You thought I was actually going to make you do something?"

"Well-um-I don't know," I say.

_Stop getting so nervous around him!_ I yell at myself in my head. We stand there quietly for awhile before he breaks the silence.

"Have you ever just meet one person and want to tell everything to them?" Blaine asks me. I quickly look up at him.

"What do you mean?" I ask him, wondering why he would ask me of all people something like that.

"You know," he says. "When you meet one person and feel the need to protect and defend them forever? Or you feel the need to open up to them and explain every little detail about yourself?"

I study his face for a minute. His eyes are so stern and I can never tell what he feels. He's so scared all the time, he just hides in a braver way then I do.

"I guess yeah," I answer seeing if he is trying to tell me something. We slip into silence again, listening to the roaring water of the chasm. I listen to the quick rush and decide that the water is flowing as fast as my heart.

My eyes flicker to Blaine's face, as he stares intently at the roaring stream. I smile. His eyelashes are long, and he smiles at his thoughts. The little dent at the end of his lips when he smiles is something I've only seen two or three times.

He looks over and sees me starring at him with massive heart eyes. A small smirk spreads across his face. "What's wrong?" he asks me. I smile at the question because for the first time, everything is okay.

"I am absolutely 100% fine," I answer positive that I am. His eyes light up and he full out smiles. I look down and bite my lip.

"Good," he says. "_I hope it doesn't go away," _he whispers so soft that I barely picked it up. He clearly didn't want me to hear it, but I did. Before I question I think about how I felt when he asked me about my past life. So I decide to forget about for awhile.

We both look away and watch the water flow through the chasm for an hour and a half, until training ended.

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Uriah, Puck, Santana and I all walked down to the tattoo parlor together. We laugh and push each other as we wonder down the stony halls. When we arrive at a door that says _Free Tattoos_ we knock and push it open.

I look around the room that has orange neon walls and pictures of different designs around the room. I take on the surroundings as the smell of ink fills my nose. I feel a little nervous but remember a word Blaine had told that I find myself mumbling almost every hour. _Courage._ Suddenly a confident smile takes over my face.

"Back so soon," I hear a women say. I look away from a picture on the wall and my mouth drops open. I recognize her. It's Tori from my aptitude test. She smiles at me. "Kurt," she says.

"Hi," I mumble awkwardly. Puck looks at us.

"You two know each other?" he asks us wondering why my reaction is so different.

"I did his aptitude test," she explains. She looks at me and studies my face before I look away quickly. "So what now you guys?" she asks smiling and cleaning one of her tattoo machines.

Puck steps up immediately. "Our little Kurt here is getting his first tattoo," he explains proudly. Tori smiles at me.

"Is that so?" Tori says walking closer to us. "What are you getting, Kurt?" she asks me.

I feel uncomfortable but I have so many questions to ask her. _Courage, _I tell myself again. "The dauntless symbol," I peep getting enough courage and bravery to take over my body.

"Alright then," she says grabbing my wrist and pulling me over to a leather chair that has a foot wrest. She tells me to take a seat and take my shirt off. I bite my lip and hesitate. _Courage, courage, courage, courage, _I dare myself. I sit up and quickly pull my shirt over my head. I sit back as quick as possible. The three of them gather around me and Tori puts latex gloves on and picks up the tattoo gun.

"You ready?" she asks me. My eyes flicker to hers and we hold our gaze. My jaw tightens as I nod my head. Suddenly a buzzing sound fills the room and I feel painful pricks send chills up and down my back as it poked my biceps.

Puck places his hand on my shoulder and squeezes. "You alright?" he asks me. I look up at him.

"I'm fine," I tell him. We sit there in silence for awhile until the buzzing stops. I look at my arm and notice the black ink that is etched into my skin. I smile. The skin is red and puffy but I see is the black fire, reminding me of courage and bravery.

"WOO HOO!" Shouts Puck. I laugh at Uriah and him as they high five and me and Santana walk them and roll our eyes at the goofy teens.

"Can you guys go now?" I ask. "I'm just going to use the bathroom I'll see you by the chasm in a little," I lie. They nod and walk out of the room chatting quietly.

"Aren't you going to use the bathroom?" Tori asks obviously confused.

"No," I answer. "I need some answers," I whisper softly to hear my eyes looking at my folded hand that wrest in my lap.

She looks up at me quickly her eyes going wide. She walks to the door closes and locks it. I shoot her a confused expression. She shushes me and sits in the chair next to mine.

"You haven't told anybody, right?" she asks me concerned.

"Not a single soul," I say honestly, my eyes pleading her for answers to the questions that have been plaguing my mind ever sense my test. She looks back at me before sighing.

"They think you, and any other divergent threaten the system of choosing where you want to stay for your life," she explains.

"Who are _they_?" I ask needing to know who I'm hiding from. She sighs again, getting up to whisper in my ear.

"They could be watching," she tells me before sitting back. My eyes go wide and scared. "You could lose your life. Is it wrong? Of course. Does anybody give a fuck? Of course not," she answers herself looking at her hands quietly.

"Please Tori," I plead. "I need to know," I say demanding. She raises he eyes to lock with mine again.

She sighs in defeat and I instantly sit up. "I can't say names. But remember the ones we hail are the worst of all," she tells me. I stare blankly at her. I blink a few times before gasping.

I think of that song I heard Blaine sing in the shower. _The ones we hail are the worst of all, and the bloods run stale._ I freeze a little now completely scared and shocked. She gets up and unlocks the door. "You should go now," she tells me. "Come back anytime though," she says right before I run out of the room and down the hallway.

My mind feels blank but I don't care. I just keep running and running until I can't breathe. I find myself stopped right outside Blaine's room. I stare at it. The lyrics swirling through my head making it pound. I want to scream, but I can't. _And the ones we hale are the worst of all and the bloods run stale._

I venture farther down the hallway trying to fathom my thoughts. When I can't I walk into a dark empty hallway and sit. _Will I ever_ _catch a break?_ I ask myself. I feel stressed and numb as all feelings and emotions go blank. Stray tears drip off my cheek as more and more blur my vision. I hear somebody coming so I get to my feet and wipe away my tears. When I look up blue eyes lock with gorgeous hazel orbs.

I take in a harsh breathe at the sight. "And the ones we hale are the worst of all…" I say to him. He looks at me quizzically, like he's mocking me. Suddenly his eyes go wide.

"How-"I cut him off by running up to him and slapping him.

"You're divergent," I say. It isn't it a question, it's a statement. His eyes go wide and he runs and grabs my wrist and pulls me after him. "Blaine let me go!" I scream but he picks me up and throws me over his shoulder. I gasp and kick my legs. "Put me down this instant," I order sternly.

He laughs at me. "Not going to happen beautiful," Blaine says. Suddenly I blush like crazy and cross my arms. We reach his room and he opens the door and throws me on the bed. I look up at him pissed off.

"How do you know that?" he asks me harshly his hazel eyes burning into my mind like a fire had been lit in them.

I stutter at first. "I am divergent," I tell him. "I heard you singing that in the shower and Tori told me this hint. And the ones we hale are the worst of all," I say.

Blaine watches me alert and confused. My breathe catches in my throat as he sits next to me and our thighs touch. He takes a deep puff of air before talking. "We can't talk here. Meet me at the net at 12:00. Got it?" he asks.

I nod sharply at him. He pats my back and tells me to go. I walk out of them room and go to the chasm where Puck, Santana, Uriah and the rest of the gang are. "Hey guys," I say when I reach them.

"Sup dude," Uriah says hitting my arm. I scream a little high pitched. "Oh fuck Kurt I'm so sorry! How can I make it up to you?" he asks jokingly bouncing his eyebrows up and down. I laugh and shove him away. We all giggle softly before we all turn to the chasm.

I look away to see Blaine stroll in and we lock eyes. His eyes read me like I'm an open book as if he has to focus to read every detail. I stare back and smile lightly at him, and he mirrors my actions. I look down and blush and listen to the pounding of the water smashing against the chasm walls.

After standing there silently we head to the cafeteria to get some dinner. I listen to our shoes connect with the floor creating little taps on the stone floor. When we get our table I sit between Christina and Santana. I comment on Christina's shoes which then erupts into conversation about the dauntless styles. We chat for a while on various topics.

When Eric walks in and tells us we should get to bed because we will need to e focused tomorrow we head to bed. Everybody is silent when we get to the room. It's awkward because they either like me, or like Dave. We climb into bed and everybody closes their eyes but I sit awake.

Time passes slowly as a wait to 12:00 o'clock to finally reach me. I stare at the ceiling letting my mind wander. _What will Blaine tell me tonight? What will he do? Will he answer my questions? Did he know I was divergent? Does he like me?_ All those questions swarm my thoughts like angry bees escaping a nest.

As more endless hours creep up on me, the clock finally reads 11:55. I slowly crawl down the ladder of my bed and cringe lightly when everybody stirs in their sleep. Luckily everybody stays where they are and no eyes peel open. I sigh in relief and walk slowly and silently out of the quiet room that is only filled with occasional snores. When I get out of the room the door clicks shut and I squeal when a hand covers my mouth and a body presses against my back.

"Relax," laughs Blaine, his breathe dancing across my ear, making me shiver. "Is it cold in here," he breathes out.

He moves his hand off my mouth and I turn around quickly. "Don't scare me like that," I order.

"Sorry," he says raising his hand is surrender letting a light smile cross his lips. We both laugh a little before he reaches down and grabs my hand. "Come on," he says tugging my hand toward him. We run down the halls toward the net for awhile until I make him stop running cause I couldn't breathe. We laugh and his golden eyes light up with laughter. We stare at each other for a while and I realize were still holding hands.

I look down embarrassed before quickly pulling my hand away. Blaine's eyebrows nit together in confusion. His hand goes to the back his head. "I'm sorry he mumbles.

My eyes go wide and I look up at him. Blue eyes meet golden ones and I open my mouth. "Don't be sorry," I tell him. We walk the rest of the way silently through the cold hallways.

When we reach the net I finally ask him. "Why did you want to meet me out here?"

"I wanted to make sure know body could hear us out here," he says. He hesitates and leans on the net. "Yes," is all he says.

"Wait, what?" I ask him. I walk over to the net and lay against it, looking at him.

He looks back at me and answers. "I'm divergent," he tells me. "I couldn't tell you earlier because they could've heard us."

I stop my foot frustrated. "Who the hell is they?!" I shout. Blaine throws his hand over my mouth again.

"Keep your voice down. 'They' is the government. Such as Jeanine Matthews," my eyes go wide and scared as everything makes more sense. "I'm going to move my hand away. Can you be quiet?" he asks. I nod my head quickly, and he moves his hand away. I jump up and sit on the net and roll into the middle. He laughs at me and jumps up and lies next to me.

"Why do they not like divergent's?" I ask him. He turns his head and we stare at each other as we both focus and study each other's faces.

"We _threaten the system_," he says putting air quotes as he tells me.

"How?" I say confused wondering how we threaten the system.

"Jeez you're just filled with questions," he tells me and laughs. I smile at him a little.

"Yes I am," I answer. Then he smiles. Full out smiles and joy takes over his face. It's the first time I've ever seen him show full emotion.

"Well, they think that sense we aren't fully capable of choosing where we would like to stay. But I think that's special. In a world like this, what makes you different makes you dangerous. And if being dangerous means that I can be different, I want to be dangerous," he tells me. I smile at that. Blaine is different and that what I love about him. _WAIT WHAT? DID I JUST THINK THAT'S WHAT I __**LOVE**__ ABOUT HIM? _HOLY FUCK.

"Ye-yeah," is all I can say. "Why are you always so sheltered?" I ask him. His head snaps up and he looks nervous.

"I um," is all he says. "I'll tell you someday," he tells me. His hand reaches down and grabs mine. "I promise,"

I take in a breathe and close my eyes for a minute. We lock eyes and his sparkle. They grow darker and it looks like he has something on his mind. I open my mouth but shut it. "What do you want, Kurt?"

My mouth goes dry but nothing stops me from saying it. "You," I mumble. He automatically launches at me.

His lips connect with mine my body fills with warmth at the sudden protection and closeness I feel to him in that minute. We lay there with our lips attached not moving them. We pull back and I stare at him. His pupils are dilated with lust and I'm positive mine are to. "Why did you stop?" I ask with a pout.

"Did you want me to kiss you more?" he teases me. I laugh at his goofy look.

"Yes," I say my pout growing bigger.

"Then I'll just kiss that pout away," he says tapping my nose. His mouth is on mine again and I smile. _This is happening. He's kissing me and I'm so happy I could cry_ I think to myself but snap out of my thoughts and I moan as his tongue licks across my bottom lip asking for entrance. I open my mouth wider and out tongues dance together. We both moan and suddenly my body needs more.

My hands move to the back of his head and I tug on his hair slightly. He moves his mouth away and kisses down my neck. My breathing gets frantic and I moan even louder than before. "Mmm Kurt you have no idea what you do to me," he mumbles against my neck.

"Blaine," I say in a broken whimper and his mouth covers mine again. It's soft and sweet and we pull apart after that. He kisses m neck again and I throw my head back. I see somebody quickly turn around and run. I couldn't see who it was. "Blaine," I say tapping his shoulder as he lays love bites up and down my neck.

"Relax babe I got you," he tells me. I sit up and he gets off me.

"I swear somebody just was standing there," I whisper to him. He looks at me confused and realizes how bad I'm panicking.

He crawls over to me and takes me in his arms. "Relax there's nobody there," he tells me. I look up at him quickly.

"I know a person when I see one. That was a person," I hiss at him pointing to where I saw the man.

"Whoever it was they're gone now. We can stop if you want," he tells me. I nod and he pulls me in his arms and we lay there with my head on his chest as he strokes my back slowly up and down. I sigh and bury my face in his neck.

"Have you had a boyfriend before?" I ask him.

He laughs a little before nodding. "Yeah," he says. "When I was an initiate but that's over now," he explains.

I nod. "Have you um…" I hesitate before asking.

"Have I what?" he asks me wondering. I take in a breathe.

"Have you had sex before?" I rush out blushing and burying my face farther in his neck. He laughs slightly.

"Yes," he says. "Plenty times," he tells me. "You?" he asks.

I go bright red. But then I remember. "Umm, not really," I tell him. He looks at me confused.

"What do you mean not really?" he asks me concerned. His eyes are sparkling from the moonlight.

I take sigh and think before I say anything. _Courage_ is the word I repeat in my head. "I was…forced," I tell him. He shoots up and looks at me. Were both sitting up now and my eyes go wide.

"Kurt, I'm so, so, so sorry. I had no idea I never should have forced you to make out with me," I cut him off.

"Blaine calm down. I wanted to make out with you," I tell him smiling. He sighs in relief and relaxes a little.

"Who was it?" he asks. I take in a terrified breathe and close my eyes.

"David Karowsky," I mumble. A tear falls down my face and Blaine jumps over to cradle me in his arms. I sob into his chest and he strokes my back and whispers sweet nothings into my ear. I grip his shirt so tight and sob harder than I ever had before. "Please don't leave me now," I whimper. "Please," I plead brokenly.

"I don't plan on it," he tells me and kisses my forehead.

As my sobs die down I pull away and he wipes my tears. "You're perfect Kurt. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I smile at him and another tear falls off my cheek and he kisses it away.

I don't think before I tackle him down on the net and kiss him again. He moans and my tongue slips inside his mouth. His hand lies on the middle of my thigh and the other wrests in my hair. He flips us over and pushes me into the net to start sucking on my neck. "Blaineeeee," I whine helpless as my body becomes overwhelmed with pleasure and I feel my pants tighten. "Fuck Blaine please," I whimper.

He pulls back at the pleading tone in my voice. "We have to cool down, Kurt," he tells me and rubs his hand across my cheek.

"You straddling me really isn't helping," I tell him blushing as I bite my lip. He laughs and roles off and we lay there staring at the stars, our hands folded around each others.

_Home_, I think to myself as Blaine pulls me closer and I bury my face in his neck just to breathe him in.


	5. Chapter 5

A few days go by with me and Blaine stealing kisses secretly and casting each other glances and shy smiles. It's been getting frustrating that we sneak around and barely talk. But there has been plenty other things on my mind. Tomorrow is visiting day and my nerves have been getting the best of me.

In training we've just been fighting and shooting and knife throwing. Today we are supposed to be getting tested and ranked on our scores. I feel scared that I'll be the worst and get kicked out to live factionless for the rest of my life.

When all of us are sitting in the cafeteria for breakfast I sit there silently eating. Blaine looked at me across the room and we made eye contact and he motioned his head out the door, before slipping out of the large room.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom," I tell them quickly getting up and running out. I feel their gazes on me as I exit but I really don't care. Blaine was standing there waiting for me and we start walking to his room is silence.

"I want to hold your hand so bad," I whisper to him. Without a moment's hesitation his hand moves to grip mine. I gasp.

"Blaine I want to too but we can't," I tell him trying to tug away but he doesn't let me.

"Babe relax," he mumbles pushing my back against a stony wall. He kisses and licks my neck softly and quietly, sending shivers of lust and want through my body and straight to my cock.

I moan softly. "I love when you call me babe," I tell him moaning as he bites my neck.

"Mmm good _babe_," he tells me putting extra emphasize on the word and picking me up so my legs wrap around his waist.

I groan and arch my neck to give him more access. "Kiss me," I mumble before groaning again. His head shoots up and his eyes are dilated and lust blown. Suddenly lips meet lips and hands are all over each other. Blaine's hips thrust into mine and I squeak and wrap my legs tighter around him. "Please Blaine please," I plead him. "What do you want, Kurt?" he asks me. Before I answer we hear footsteps approaching quickly. Blaine drops me and backs up right before Eric turns the corner.

An amused smirk crosses his lips. H stares at us, but more me. "What happened?" he asks Blaine walking to us arms crosses over his burly chest.

"Um well- nothing," Blaine squeaks before he makes a fake laugh and looks down, stopping the laugh abruptly. Eric looks at him up and down for a minute.

Eric then turns toward me and stares. An uneasy feeling takes over my body and he then he opens his mouth. "So Blaine," he says looking away from me. "I just found out that Sebastian will be arriving in a few days to check out the initiates. Won't it be nice to see him again?" Eric asks an amused expression crossing his facial expressions for the second time in three minutes. _Cocky much,_ I think to myself.

Blaine throws Eric an angry expression. "Eric don't act like that. You know damn well I'm not, _**ever**_ going to be nice to see him again. I actually think I won't make eye contact with him the whole time," he snarls defensively. Eric pretends to look taken aback.

"Relax buddy," Eric says patting Blaine's back. "I was kidding. I know what happened between you too. I mean really he _cheated _on you," he says putting extra emphasis on the word cheating. My eyes go wide and Blaine just stares at him. "Anyway bye," he says cockily as he walks away pleased with himself.

Once Eric is fully out of sight Blaine runs off to his room. First my mind doesn't process what happened. "Blaine!" I shout running after him. I run down a few halls Blaine much farther ahead of me. I reach his door right after I clip's shut. I turn the knob quickly being thankful to hear a click which means he didn't lock me out.

When I enter, Blaine has his shirt off and is unbuttoning his pants. "Um, hi?" is all I can get out. _My boyfriend is stripping in front of me. Wait what? Boyfriend? Are we boyfriends? _I snap myself out of my thoughts when I look up to see Blaine, with nothing but _really tight_ boxer briefs. "Blaine, what?" is all I can get out. I hear water running in the bathroom.

"I'm taking a shower. We'll talk when I'm finished," he explains before slamming the bathroom door, making me flinch. I sit on the bed and stare at my hands, which are sticky with sweat for the incident in the hallway. I groan and walk into the steamy bathroom and call out Blaine's name.

"Yeah babe?" comes his response from inside the shower. I almost groan thinking of him dripping wet under the steamy shower spray.

"I-um, I have to wash my hands," is all I say.

"Okay babe," is his only reply. I walk to the sink and turn on the cold water before running my hands under it. When I turn it off there's a knock on the bathroom door.

"Blaine?" comes Eric's deep voice. I panic feeling scared.

"Fuck," I hear Blaine say from the shower. Without thinking I jump into the steamy shower in my black muscle shirt and very tight black jeans with black leather boots. Blaine's eyes go wide and he screams "Come in!" before pulling my back against his body and putting his hand over my mouth. I feel my close get wet and I feel Blaine's soft cock press against the rough material of my jeans.

I squeaked softly at the steaming water and Blaine rushed around to turn the waters temperature down. "Blaine, I'm sorry about what happened in the corridor," I hear Eric say threw the curtain.

"Yeah its fine Eric, don't be sorry," Blaine speaks up from behind me. "It really doesn't matter anymore."

Eric coughs from outside the shower before speaking again. "He still cheated on you and I shouldn't have said anything. If I could do something to avoid him coming here I would," he confesses. Blaine clears his throat.

"Really Eric it's fine, I could care less about him anyway," comes Blaine's voice behind me.

"You know you can talk to me about him anytime, right?" Eric asks Blaine. I stand there awkwardly pressed into Blaine with his hand over my mouth.

"There's nothing to talk about. I am seriously over him and I think I like someone else," Blaine tells Eric wrapping his second hand around my waist and pushing my body closer to his as he lands soft kisses on my shoulder.

"Care to tell me who?" Eric asks, I hear a little hope in his voice, although it seems like he already knows.

"Maybe some other day," Blaine says after he pulled back from licking at my neck.

"Before I leave I have a question," says Eric.

"What is it?" Blaine asks zoned out as he started trailing more kisses down my neck. I moan lightly against his hand and he pulls away instantly.

"Kurt wasn't in the cafeteria when I got back. Do you know where he is?" Eric asks. My eyes bolt open and I tilt my head to look at Blaine.

"Um-I-um-I haven't seen him," Blaine answers wincing when he sounded unconvincing.

"Hmm okay," Eric says. "See you later," then I hear a door click. Suddenly Blaine turns me around and shoves my back against the wall. I hiss in pain.

"Shit babe are you okay?" he asks me. When I nod his mouth seals over mine quickly and he takes my bottom lip between his teeth.

"Blaine," I mumble against his mouth trying to get him to stop.

"Mmm Kurt," is his only reply. I start to panic immediately flashbacks of David diving around in my mind.

"Blaine please stop!" I scream when a tear falls down my face. He puts me down quickly and I run out of the bathroom and lay on Blaine's bed.

I bury my head in the pillow and scream. I'm not in Blaine's room. I'm in the school hallways and David walks by me. He puts his hand on my shoulder. "Kurt! Kurt!" he keeps shouting. "It's me. It's Blaine, relax you're safe. He can't hurt you," David says. I shake my head quickly and suddenly Blaine's in front of me. I sob and he holds me in his strong protecting grasp.

"B-B-Blaine," is the only thing I say.

"Shhhh baby it's me. I won't let him hurt you. I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, sorry. I'll never do that to you ever again. I'm so sorry," he pleads. I look up from where my head is buried in his chest. He has tears rolling down his face.

"Blaine, baby don't cry. Please don't. Don't be sorry. It was an accident you didn't know, it wasn't your fault," I whisper into his ear before landing gentle, reassuring kissing along his check.

"I never want to hurt you like that," he confesses. I look up at him and my hand gently glides over his cheek.

"And you didn't," is all I tell him. Then were kissing. It's sweet and gentle and everything felt so right. Our lips slid together like two broken pieces of glass getting glued back together. "I," first I hesitate. _I love you, I love you, I love you,_ Is what I dare myself to say. "I have so many feelings for you," is all I can get out.

"Well Kurt Hummel," he says. "I have so many feelings for you too." We stare at each other for a while before I sigh and clear my throat.

"We should probably head back," is all I say. He nods at me and gets off the bed. I notice that he's wearing nothing but a white towel.

"I have to get ready. I'll see you in training," he tells me, planting a light kiss on my forehead. When he closes the door to the bathroom the only thing I bring myself to say is "Fuck."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

We stand in training Eric lecturing us. My clothes are still wet and sticking to me and I feel **very **uncomfortable. Blaine stands in the corner arms crosses. He looks so hidden again. It seems like he never shows emotions because he's too scared. But he'll show me his emotions, and I couldn't be more pleased. When I look back to Eric his eyes are locked on me. "Shit," I mumble so softly that neither Santana nor Al heard me, who was standing right beside me.

"Why are your clothes soaked?" is all he asks. I hesitate and look over to see Blaine's eyes go wide. I stutter then Blaine enters in.

"Eric just leave the kid alone," is all he says. Eric turns to Blaine before saying "Was I asking you?" Blaine's mouth goes wide and his eyes flicker with fury and anger.

"It's nothing," is my reply, to try and stop Blaine from lunging at Eric and tearing his face off. "The sink in the bathroom that I used was just acting up," I explain.

"Oh really?" Eric says. "It soaked your whole body?" he asks me.

"Why do you care?" I ask stepping forward with my arms crossed over my chest tightly. I stare at him, daring him to say it. His eyebrows go up and he stares for a few seconds, his mouth wide.

"I don't," is all he says.

"Then why did you ask?" I ask him. Blaine watches me from a few feet away.

"Go stand in front of that," Eric says, pointing at the boards we throw our knives at.

I turn to see Santana and Al's eyes go wide. She bites her lip before she folds her hands behind her back. I walk over to the board confidently and stand in front of it. "Blaine come here," Eric orders. Blaine walks over and stands beside Eric. His eyes shows that he's worried about me. I lock eyes with him and just barley put the tips of my mouth up. He nods at me before Eric starts talking.

"Blaine take these," he says, handing Blaine four knives. I gulp and my eyes go wide. I start pleading Blaine to do something in my head. "Throw them," Eric instructs.

"What!?" Blaine shouts. "Are you insane?" he asks. Eric looks at him; amused.

"Of course not," Eric says. "Why won't you throw the knife Blaine? Something wrong?" he asks Blaine. Blaine face is taken over with anger.

"Of course nothing's wrong," Blaine says. "You're just fucking screwed up," Blaine shouts before his fist connects with Eric's check.

"Blaine!" I shout. I run over to him quickly and Uriah runs over to. He pulls Eric back but can't quite hold him back. Eric breaks free and his fist collides against Blaine's cheek, before his foot hits his gut. "Stop!" I plead. Puck runs over and holds Eric back and Blaine gets to his feet.

"Blaine please stop," I beg him, my hand on his shoulder. He nods and I sigh in relief. Blaine looks over to Eric and lunges at him again. "No!" I shout. He keeps letting his knee connect with Eric's stomach. Suddenly a shout comes from the door. A man with brown hair runs into the room and pulls Blaine back. Blaine and Eric both stop and when Blaine's eyes lock with the other mans, before he runs out of them room.

"Blaine!" I shout before I start to run after him. Eric grabs my arm and pulls me back.

"You two are in a relationship," is all he says. Suddenly I lose all my patients before I jump on Eric. I knee him hard in the stomach before Puck pulls me back. I kick and scream in his arms but he throws me to the ground.

"Kurt stop!" he shouts at me. I go silent quickly and push Puck off me, before running out.

When I start to run towards his room I stop. I look down and he has his head resting on the wall and his hand over his eye. "Babe," I sigh dropping next to him on the floor.

"Kurt?" he whimpers brokenly. My eyes widen with sadness and I let him dive into my arms. He sobs for a minute before putting his shield back up.

"Blaine its okay, baby. Everything's going to be okay, I promise," is all I tell him. He nods before we make eye contact. And he leans in and kisses me sweetly, and gently.

"Thank you," he mumbles and we hug for a little, not breaking apart. Somebody clears their throat behind us, and I look up to see Uriah and Puck standing there.

"I'm not surprised," Pucks says sitting down next to me. I laugh a little at him and push him gently. "He would always check you out. I swear he practically undressed you with eyes," Puck tells Blaine. Blaine smiles, amused.

"Did you now?" Blaine asks smiling and scooting closer to me. I look down and blush slightly. "Maybe," I mumble.

Blaine smirks and kisses my cheek gently, before wrapping me up in a warm protective hug. I smile and hide my head in his chest. "Aweee," Uriah cooed. I look up at him and he pulls me to my feet. I look down at Blaine and reach my hands down. He sighs and lets me pull him to my feet.

"I'm gonna go take a nap," Blaine tells me turning to walk away but I stop him. He sighs and turns to face me. "Please, babe?" he asks me.

"No," I tell him with a little tap on his nose. He frowns at me, his eyes pleading. "You can't avoid that guy forever."

"_That guy" _Blaine says putting air quotes. "Is Sebastian," he tells me.

"Oh," is all I can bring myself to say. "I didn't know that. I thought he wasn't coming for a while," I say.

"So did I," Blaine tells me. He looks to the ground first before whispering. "Please just let me go." The sadness in his eyes is evident so I nod.

He turns to go but I grab his wrist and turn him around. "Kurt," Blaine says but I cut him off with a soft kiss. _I love you_ I think to myself. "Now go," I say when we separate. He smiles lightly before walking away. When he's no longer in view I turn to look at Uriah and Puck.

"Well?" is all I say. Puck walks over to me his face straight. Suddenly he jumps up and down before throwing me over his shoulder and dancing. I laugh and scream. "Put me down!" The three of us laugh for a little before the other initiates come into the hallway. Lynn, Marlene, Santana, Christina, Will, and Al walk up to us.

"Eric dismissed everybody for lunch," Lynn explains. I nod and then Eric and Sebastian walk out. I turn to walk away quickly but Eric grabs my arm.

"Initiates go to lunch," he tells them waving them off. "No," I say.

"Whatever you say to me you can say in front of them," I tell him. He rolls his eyes and Sebastian's judgmental cold gaze is held on me.

"Fine," Eric says. "Where's Blaine?" he asks me, arms folded tightly over his chest.

I laugh a little pushing down the nerves in my stomach. "Like he wants to see either one of you," I say. Sebastian steps forward.

"Listen kid, I need to talk to him. So tell us where he is, and we won't have a problem," he orders me. I look at him my mouth wide. I turn to look at my friends and they're jaws are all set with aggravation.

"First of all, we already have a problem seeing as though you're a dick head-" but I'm cut off when Blaine walks up behind me.

"Sebastian," he says cockily. Sebastian smiles and laughs before an amused smile takes over his face.

"Blaine," he says. "So you found yourself a new fuck toy?" he asks his face serious.

"Blaine turns around and faces me and my friends. "Can you guys go to the cafeteria please?" he asks politely, trying to contain his anger. They all nod and Puck punches him playfully on the shoulder before walking out. I stand there, my eyes flickering with anger. "Kurt please?" Blaine asks.

"No," is all I say. Blaine walks over to me and whispers in my ear.

"Leave now and I'll give you a surprise later," he says hotly. I gulp a shiver going up my spine. But I resist the urge to agree.

"No," is all I say. "Whatever he wants to say he can say around me," I say defensively.

"Fine," Blaine sighs defeated. "Eric's leaving though," he says letting his gaze settle on him.

Eric throws his hand up walking out of the hallway, towards the cafeteria.

Sebastian smiles at Blaine. "Isn't it great to see each other again?" Sebastian says smiling cockily, taking a step closer to Blaine.

Blaine steps away before answering. "No," is all he says. Sebastian sighs.

"Oh Blaine," he says. "You really need to get over it. Plus you look really tense, babe. Let me help you loosen up," he says his hands stroking down Blaine's arms. Blaine pushes him off gently and my eyebrows go up.

"Watch it," I warn Sebastian, my eyes locking on his.

"Oh right, Blaine. Introduce me to your new fuck toy," he says smiling.

Blaine takes a threatening step forward, but I put my hand on his shoulder. He takes a deep breath before replying. "Kurt isn't a _fuck toy_. He's actually an awesome and supportive person. Unlike you, who treated me like shit!" he yells the end of the sentence. Sebastian's face changes, and he looks at me.

"What did he tell you, about us?" he asks me, obviously amused. Our eyes meet and his look so dark and empty of thoughts.

"Enough to know that you're a fucking douche bag, who probably cheats on all his boyfriends. Or was that just Blaine?" I ask him my thoughts sparking with aggravation. His mouth twitches upward with an amused smirk.

"Don't believe everything Blaine tells you, then. I may have cheated but he broke my heart," Sebastian says. I laugh and smirk a little. Blaine steps up behind me forcing me in back of him.

"I broke up with you, because _you broke my heart_," Blaine said sternly. I could tell his eyes were shimmering with helpless glossy tears. "Finding out you cheated on me, seeing as though you were the first person I ever allowed myself to love," he says, his voice cracking.

"Blaine it was just sex, I don't see the big deal. Plus it was only one time," Sebastian told him arm coming to rest on his cheek. Blaine pushed it away quickly.

"Don't ever come near me again, Sebastian. I swear I will beat you so bad you won't walk for months," Blaine says, the sadness and despair leaving his voice, being left behind with raging anger.

"Blaine babe, please," Sebastian said stepping closer and moving his lips closer to Blaine's. Blaine pushed him away and ran off down the cold hallways. His body disappears down the stony path and I turn to Sebastian. I scoff before walking out of the room quickly.

I storm into the cafeteria ignoring all the gazes that are held on me. I feel like screaming but I quickly run and Lynn and Marlene have me sit between them. Lynn wraps a hand around my shoulder and lets me lay my head on her shoulder. I look up and see Eric's icy stone cold eyes locked on me.

I look away immediately and look at my hands folded in my lap. I then bring my hands to my face and cover my face with them. "You okay?" Marlene asks me.

"I think I'm as fine as I could be in this situation," I answer truthfully.

"On a happier subject," says Puck. "Hummel's got his first boyfriend." He starts raising his eyebrows and then asks. "Give us details, how's Blaine in bed?" he concludes with a devious smirk.

"Puck!" I shout. Everybody laughs at us.

"Come on Hummel, talk it up," Will says from where he's sitting across the table.

"Wehaven'thadsexyet," I rush out quickly. They all look at me confused and then I say it slower. "We haven't had sex yet."

They all watch me with their mouths open wide and Puck looks like he's about to cry. "Good I was afraid my boy Hummel had lost his V card," he says.

"Shut up!" I yell pushing him gently. "Plus I want to, I'm just too nervous," I confess blushing.

"Oh my little Kurt," Lynn pipes up from beside me. "Has Blaine lost his virginity yet? I wouldn't be shocked because even I admit he's smoking."

I sigh quickly before saying "Of course he's lost his virginity. That guy who came today is his ex."

"Oh," I all everyday says in unison. I nod lightly before exhaling and letting the word "yeah," fall from my lips.

We sit in silence for a while before I excuse myself as soon as Sebastian walks in. I throw my garbage away before rushing to Blaine's room. I hear footsteps behind me but ignore it. When a deep voice exclaims my name I stop. I turn to see Eric standing there.

"Going to see Blaine?" he asks me. His face is set, focused and he looks aggravated.

I nod before saying "I have to check and see how he his seeing as though you and that ignorant bastard don't give a shit about anyone but yourself."

Eric goes to say something but I cut him off. "And you know what? I doubt you even know what real _bravery_ is. Bravery is courage. I doubt you even know what courage is. Because you know what? To be brave you need to be selfless. Bravery is when you put your life on the line to save a life or help somebody you care about. But seeing as though you don't give a rat's ass about anybody but _yourself,_ you are not brave. Bravery has to find you, or you won't have it," I scream instantly turning and running away from him, leaving his gaping mind behind me.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I reach Blaine's room and knock, and he shouts "Who is it?" "Kurt!" I shout back. I hear movement and the door opens. I step in and Blaine instantly walks back and lies on the bed. His hair dark hair is settled on his head untamed and curly, and his face is red and I get the sense he had been crying. He's wearing loose sweatpants with no shirt on.

I go sit next to him on the babe quickly and rub a reassuring hand over his cheek. We make eye contact when I mumble "Are you okay?" in a concerned voice. All he does is shake his head and I open my arms and he dives into them.

We change position so we both lay down and he comes behind, spooning me. I laugh lightly before looking over my shoulder. "Are you spooning me?" I ask a hint of amusement in my voice.

"Yes," he mumbles softly burying his face in my neck. I smile and melt into his grasp. He whispers sweet nothings into my ear and I sigh.

"I should be comforting you right now," I say.

He laughs lightly before responding. "You already are." When I look up at him confused he clarifies. "Your presence makes me feel safe, Kurt. I just don't want to lose you, and knowing I have the opportunity to love you means everything," he whispers brokenly.

I sit up and he moves of me. "You love me?" I ask him my eyes going wide and pleading. He smiles up on me, looking content.

"I didn't want to fall in love with you," he admits to me. "All I've ever gotten from loving somebody, even my feel, ended with destruction. But when I'm with you, I don't need to be reassured about your feelings because I don't feel the need to leave you, and I hope you don't feel the need to leave me. And that's what love is right? It's a profoundly tender, passionate for another person. That's what I feel around you," he admits, the words flowing out of him freely with not a care in the world.

"Blaine," I whimper. "I love you too," I admit. Then were kissing. His lips sealing over mine with a warm and safe passion. "I love you so much," I say when we part.

He flips us over so my back dips into the mattress, as his body folds over mine. I let my mind slip from all other feeling and my head fills with everything Blaine. His eyes, his touch, his smell, _even his love._

I then finally bring myself to ask what I've wanted to ask for a while. I whisper it in his ear. _"Make love to me,"_ is all I say. He pulls back and our eyes lock.

"Kurt," he says. "Are you sure?" he asks concerned his eyes taken with lust.

I nod and bring our lips together again. His body moves over mine and I brush my aching erection over Blaine's through our jeans. We both moan wantonly and he moves his body off mine slowly. "What are you-" I start to say but stop when he pulls lube and condoms out of his small nightstand. He gets up to lock the door stripping his pants off on the way back to the bed. He's wearing nothing but his boxer briefs and my eyes lock on where there is a dent forming.

I sit up and he throws my shirt over my head. He kisses my cheek and down my jaw, before he's breathing over my nipple. He takes the little pink nub between his teeth and gently bites down. I squeal softly and moan my body trembling with need. "Please," I beg him wanting more and to feel his hands all over my body. He moves up and starts to unbutton my pants. When he slips the tight black jeans off my body I pull his head up to kiss me.

The kiss is rough and filled with tongue and our teeth clatter together. I whimper and fist my hand into Blaine's hair. He moans my name into my mouth and I can't help the excitement it gave me.

When he pushes our almost nude bodies together, I go insane. "Need you now," I pant my eyes wide with want. "Please," I whimper again brokenly. Blaine lets out a little growl before peeling his tight boxer briefs down his muscle thighs.

My eyes go wide and I stare at him for about thirty seconds until he moves over me and kisses down my neck. His fingers loop into the waist line of my boxers. "Are you 100% positive you wanna do this?" he asks me, full of concern.

My hand moves up to his cheek and all I can say is "Yes." His hands tug down my boxers and I feel suddenly exposed. Blaine moans in the back of his throat and his hand moves toward me. His fist is tight and warm wrapped around me and my body is absorbed with warmth and love.

I throw my head back and then I feel his mouth sucking a hickey write below my jaw line. "Blaine!" I scream and he pulls back smirking. When I open my mouth to say something he attaches our mouths together and starts to rub our aching hard cocks together.

"Ungh," is the only thing I can bring myself to say. "Blaine more now," I plead my pupils dilated and lust blown.

He nods and my eyes slip shut. All I hear is the bottle of lube being popped open, and then I feel a cold finger poking my entrance. "You ready?" Blaine mumbles into my neck. I nod furiously, pushing my nerves aside. "This will feel different at first but trust me it will feel better," he explains. I keep my eyes closed and smile slightly at how safe I feel in Blaine's arms, gathered and surrounded by his love.

I snap out of my thoughts and groan loudly when Blaine's finger is fully inside of my body. I pant lightly when he moves in and out, as I lay my cock hard on my stomach. "Blaineeeeeee," I moan. "More," I demand.

He laughs lightly. "Someone's eager," he whispers in my ear. He kisses my neck as he slides a second finger in beside the first one. I moan louder at the slight stretch and my hands run down his bare back and I grip onto him tightly. He moves his fingers slowly at first, before starting to fuck them into me faster.

"One more," I plead directly into his ear. I hear him moan lightly before he warns me.

"This one's gonna burn pretty bad," he explains softly when the third finger works its way in beside the first two. I hiss at the burning stretch at first. Blaine stills his fingers before whispering reassuring nothings into my ear.

"You're so perfect angle, so good for me, I love you so much," he keeps whispering. I smile before asking him to move.

When the burn was taken away by pleasure my hips move as I try to fuck myself back on Blaine's fingers. We both moan when Blaine whispers "So tight babe, you'll feel so good around my cock babe," that finishes me off.

"Blaine please I'm ready now please," I moan endlessly into his neck. I bite and suck on his neck quickly before his fingers move out of my body, and I groan at feeling empty. From there on out were silent, except occasional moans. His cock presses inside me and I groan. He moves slowly not stopping till he's bottomed out inside me.

I swallow and my eyes are squeezed shut. He then moves out slightly before pushing back in again slowly. He repeats that action a few times as I wine beneath him. "Faster," I say, needing to feel owned and loved by Blaine.

He picks up his pace, going faster and deeper. "Open your eyes babe," he moans and I feel completely consumed by Blaine's presence. My eyes slip open and blue eyes lock with hazel. We stare at each other and Blaine explains. "I wanted to see your face when I did this," he says as he brushes against my prostate.

I practically scream and my hands move down his back and grip his ass. He starts to pound into me quickly, hitting my prostate harder every time. Broken moans are ripped from my throat. "Blaine, Blaine, Blaine, so close," I scream lightly. "Unghhh," is all I could say when his fist wrapped around my cock. I cum hard into his fist and it shoots up my chest too. I feel Blaine come inside the condom a second after then we lay there, panting.

Blaine pulls out and I wince softly at the emptiness. He gets off the bed and pulls me up silently and leads me to the bathroom. We shower together rinsing off innocently. When we step out of the hot spray Blaine can tell I'm exhausted. He picks me up bridal style and he carries me soaking wet to the bed. He places me down softly and pulls the blankets up around us.

I bury my face in his chest and sigh, feeling connected, safe, and loved. When he whispers "I love you," to me. I mumble it right back before slipping into a peaceful wrest feeling safe in Blaine's arm.


	6. Chapter 6

My eyes slip open slowly to be filled with more darkness in the comfort of Blaine's room. I feel my lovers strong secure arms wrapped around as I listen to his heart beat intently. I close my eyes and let the memories of that night flood my mind. Blaine was so sweet, so gently. Ever move he would make was so soft, it was like if he tried to hard I would just fall to pieces and he had to keep me safe. He had to protect me. And he always will.

I turn my head and nuzzle my nose farther into his chest. His arms tighten around me and I breathe in his masculine scent. When I look up Blaine is staring down at me. "Damn it," I whisper jumping slightly.

He looks up at me and laughs lightly his hazel eyes looking black from the darkness of the room. "Sorry angle. Didn't mean to scare you," he says as his hand brushes across my cheek. I smile and lay a soft and passionate kiss on his lips. He smiles against my lips and pulls me up to straddle him. I moan lightly and push into the kiss, our tongues seeking each other.

"One minute," Blaine says sitting up so his back is pressed against the headboard. We are tangled up in the sheets, still not clothed from the activities beforehand. He smiles and I feel an electric pull push my lips to his. The kiss is harder and rougher but not forced. Blaine moves his hands down to my ass and he squeezes and pulling my body forward so I unclothed chests press together. I smile and moan against his mouth and slowly kiss down his jaw and neck, to his shoulder. He moans and tries to move but I don't let him.

"Let me take care of you," I whisper into his ear, sending shivers down his spine. I feel his goose bumps form on his arms and the back of his neck. I press kisses down his chest and gently across his abdomen, avoiding his hardened nipples.

"Kurt," he whines and all I do is hum to him, right before my mouth latches onto the tiny pink nub. He growls and his hand fists my hair and I lick and bit softly before moving to the next one.

When both nipples were treated fairly I look at Blaine and blush saying "Iwanttosuckyou," so fast he looks at me confused before making a face of understanding.

"You want to give me a blowjob?" he asks me, trying to clarify. I blush a crimson red and nod lightly taking my bottom lip between my teeth. He smiles at me and I feel him get harder.

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to do," he reassures me. I nod and mumble a quick I know before yanking the blanket off both of us. I kiss down his chest and leave soft barely there butterfly kisses everywhere. Blaine sighs a content sigh and I smile. "I want to," I mumble before taking the hard head of his cock in my mouth.

Blaine moans loudly above me as my tongue laps at the head and I taste him and moan, sending vibrations through his body. "Kurt," Blaine practically screams to me. I smile around him before sinking down, and moving back up, before sucking hard and going at a rapid pace. Before I can do anything else Blaine pulls my head of gently and flips us over.

"Blaine what-" is all I can get out before breaking off into a moan when his finger pokes my entrance softly. "Ungh," is all I manage to rip from my throat. He pulls off and grabs the lube and spreads it across his fingers. I moan when he immediately inserts two fingers into my tight body.

He works me open slowly, and adds a third finger. When I've had enough I finally speak up. "Blaine I'm ready," I tell him. He reaches for a condom but I grab his wrist. "Just you," I mumble. He groans and nods and I pick up the lube and spread it over my hand. Blaine looks confused, but then my hand is on him rubbing the lube onto his cock. When I pull my hand away Blaine slowly sinks into me. After a few slow thrusts he moves faster, until he's fucking me and we moan into each other ears sharing rough kisses and bites on each other's necks.

When Blaine spills inside me I couldn't help but screaming and biting Blaine shoulder and gripping his back as my orgasm hits me like a train. We fall back and Blaine pulls out, and lies beside me. I lie there, motionlessly and try to catch my breath. I hear Blaine throw the condom in the trash before scooping me into his arms. I smile at him and he hugs my body tight to his chest, and warmth fulfills my body. I sigh and look over to the clock. "Shit Blaine it's 4:30 in the morning we slept through dinner!" I exclaim. He laughs and sits back and pulls me with him. We fix our bodies so our noses are touching, as we lay opposite of each other. Our knees touching and he smiles at me faintly.

"They'll be plenty food tomorrow, don't worry," Blaine promises. I smile nervously. Thoughts and concerns rush through my head. _What if nobody comes for me? What if my dad isn't okay? What if only Carole comes?_ I push the thoughts away and let Blaine fold me up in his warm reassuring embrace. I sigh and my eyes slip shut, as sleep finds me again.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

"Woah," is the word I wake up to. My eyes snap open only to see Eric and Sebastian standing in the doorway. Blaine sits up beneath me and that's when I notice me and Blaine are wrapped up in a blanket, in our dried come, with no clothes on.

My eyes go wide and Blaine mumbles "shit," under his breath. "Leave I'll be out in a minute," Blaine orders. Eric scrambles out of the room quickly but Sebastian turns slowly and makes an exit, the door slowly shutting behind him.

I get off Blaine and make to stand. "Do you mind if I hop in the shower quick?" I ask him, as I feel sticky and gross, with my come all up my chest. Blaine blinks up at me and licks his lips.

He nods and says "of course you can babe," before hopping out of bed and leading me to the bathroom to. I follow silently and he turns the water on and wets a face cloth, washing his body with it.

I laugh at him. "Why don't you just hop in the shower with me?" I ask, stepping closer and pressing our bodies together. He smiles lightly at me and shrugs.

"This is faster," he answers simply. I smile at him and walk towards the shower and stepping in. I stand under the spray and then I hear Blaine pull clothes on and the door open and click shut. I sigh and then let all the excitement and overwhelming feels of love wash over me. When I finish washing my hair, I turn the steamy spray off and step out. I hear Sebastian, Eric, and Blaine talking quietly and ignore it.

I pull my clothes on after I dried off, and start doing my hair quickly. I admire myself in the mirror and think about my change. I have a tattoo now, and I was actually staring at myself in the mirror. We rarely looked in mirrors on the abnegation compound. Not only that, but my wardrobe. I was wearing all black clothes, from head to toe. A black tight t-shirt, with black skinny jeans, and dark combat boots. I smile lightly to myself. _I like it,_ I think to myself, finally coming to the decision.

I open up a drawer from Blaine's sink and smile at an extra toothbrush. I brush my teeth quickly before nervously walking to the door. I take in a breath and turn the knob letting the door slide open and stepping out. I flick off the light switch and look up to see Eric quickly flip a paper over. "Your family is waiting," Eric tells me.

Suddenly I get nervous but push it aside. _Courage, _I tell myself. I nod and Blaine walks to give me a quick kiss, before I scurry out of the room. I close the door behind me before running down the halls sprinting to cafeteria.

When I reach the doors I peek in and see Puck talking to Carole, Finn and most importantly, my dad. My breath catches in my throat but nothing stops tears from forming in my eyes. I swing the doors open and my dad looks up to see me running at him. He opens his arms and I throw myself into them. I sigh into his neck, as he holds me in a tight embrace.

"I'm so sorry," is all I can get out. I hear his breath catch before he mumbles two reassuring words.

_"Don't be_," and that was it. Tears fell from my eyes sliding down my cheek. I pull back after what feels like forever and turn to Carole. She smiles and I give her a long hug. I hear Finn clear his throat from behind us and I let go of Carole and turn to him.

"Come here little brother," he tells me. I laugh at him smiling lightly.

"I'm two months older," I inform him, before jumping into his arms. When I pull back I face all of them before sighing.

"I thought you guys wouldn't come," I confess. Finn laughs at me.

"Of course we would come, little bro," Finn tells me. My dad pats me on the shoulder. I smile and look up to see Uriah moping over to us.

"He's not gonna come," he says sadly. Me and Puck look at each other concerned.

"Who?" Puck asks, walking closer to him. Uriah looks up with a saddened expression.

"Zeke, my brother," Uriah explains. My mouth forms into an O and he stares at his shoes. He bites his lip and I walk over to him and put my hand on his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry Uriah," I say. "What about your parents?" I ask him. His mouth goes wide and he looks up at me.

"They died," is all he says. My hand slaps over my mouth, and I reach out and hug him.

"I had no idea Uri, I'm so sorry I will never ever say anything like that again," I promise him. He laughs a little and pulls away from the hug.

"Its fine, you didn't know," is all he tells me. I look at him with concern before two people storm in. I look up and see Blaine with some guy on his back. My eyes go wide with jealousy and Uriah perks up.

"Zeke!" he shouts, running over to them. Zeke jumps off Blaine's back and takes Uriah into a huge bear hug. Blaine smiles at me and I nod.

"I'll be right back," I say, walking over to Blaine, where he stands with Uriah, and his brother. When I get there I look at Blaine.

"Were not telling," we say at the same time. We laugh at each other before Uriah comes in.

"You aren't gonna tell your parents you have a boyfriend?" Uriah asks confused, his eyebrows stitched together.

"Obviously," He was still looking at me confused, so I explained further. "If my dad found out I was with and 18 year old, he'd kill somebody."

Uriah then nods in understanding and I look over to Blaine. "I'll see you later, okay?" I ask Blaine. Blaine nods and smiles at me and before I walk away Uriah grabs my arm.

"Where were you yesterday? You know, after the fight?" he asks. My eyes go wide and I just turn and run back to my family, pretending Uriah isn't watching me run.

When I get back to my family, Puck and Finn are catching up on what they missed out on. I sit down in between my dad and Carole, and I lean on my dad's shoulder. He smiles down at me, and then Eric walks into the room with Sebastian. I immediately turn my head down and then Christina, and Will all come over with their families. We introduce our families and sit together. Then Lynn and Marlene come and join us.

All of us tell our families about our new compound, and I'm thankful nobody brought up my relationship or the fight I had created. We all stop talking when Eric asks for attention. Uriah and Zeke scurry over quickly to sit with us. When were all seated Eric continues.

"Initiates, the list is posted so go check that out when you're ready. Oh and there's cake," he finishes quickly. Uriah jumps up and screams.

"CAKE!" before quickly running away to get some. We all sit and laugh hysterically for a few minutes, before Puck and everybody stands. "Let's go check the list!" he shouts enthusiastically. He looks at me confused before walking off.

"You okay?" my dad asks, looking over me. I shake my head and reply.

"I'm just nervous that's all," is all I can get out. Then I see my friends running over with the list in their hands. I shoot up.

"What the hell guys?" I ask my voice raising. Puck shoves the list at me.

I look down and go numb. My name was first on the list. My mouth drops and I continue.

1: Kurt

2: Peter

3: Uriah

4: Noah

5: Santana

6: Will

6: Lynn

7: Marlene

8: David

9: Molly

10: Drew

I look up, my mouth dropping open. Puck lifts me up and dances and Peter stocks over. "This is bullshit!" he exclaims. Puck puts me down and him and Uriah step forward. They both put their game faces on and stare down at him.

"Why do you say that?" Puck asks him, furious. Uriah cuts in then.

"I know why. Because one person is better then you, so it's a crime," he says in a snarky tone.

"No," Peter says. "Because he only got number one, because HIS BOYFRIENDS IS HIS TRAINOR!" he exclaims loudly. My eyes go wide and suddenly I look to my dad, his eyebrows raised.

"Boyfriend?" is all he says. Suddenly I lunge at Peter, my fist gliding over his jaw. He looks up at me fury burning in his dark eyes. He brings his fist to my jaw and his knee straight into my gut. I jump and throw his body to the ground, then arms are around me; restraining me.

I look back to see Puck and Uriah pulling me back. When Peter gets up and jumps, David's hands grab his shoulders and tug backwards. I throw myself back and scream but then Eric appears behind Peter, and I hear Blaine shout my name. Puck and Uriah put me down quickly and Blaine storms up to me angry.

"What the hell was that about!?" Blaine shouts at us. I turn to Blaine, and I'm bubbling with rage.

"It's true isn't it? I got number one because I'm your boyfriend," I state my eyes burning with liquid. _Don't let them see you cry, _I tell myself over and over in my head.

"Of course not," Blaine quickly reassures but I cut him off.

"Do NOT LIE TO ME! I only got first because YOU TOOK PITTY ON ME!" I shout enraged. I feel every body's eyes on us, but I don't care.

"It's not true!" Eric shouts. "I told Blaine you had to be first," Eric confesses. My look up at him, my eyes wide and tears threaten to spill over.

"Why?" I ask completely and utterly confused. Eric sighs before explaining.

"What you said in the hallway yesterday, was true. To be brave you have to be selfless. Bravery doesn't come out of idiocy, it comes from courage. It isn't doing stupid things to show that you'll do almost anything. It's when you sacrifice something, for something you believe in, or someone you care about. It's not being foolhardy. It's about showing that you have power to do what you can do, and stick up for what you believe in," Eric explains to everybody. I stand there, motionless. "Now please return to what you were doing," he says kindly, walking out of the big and clustered room.

Peter walks away aggravated and I smile to myself. "You go Kurt!" Will says giving me a high five and pulling me into a quick hug. When I pull back Blaine stands in front of me with an icepack.

"I'm guessing you'll need this," Blaine tells me as a small smile spreads across his lips. But noting stops me from jumping into his arms, and letting our lips meet into a soft kiss. I pull back and smile and he brings the icepack to rest on my cheek. I laugh lightly, and my dad clears his throat behind us. Blaine moves his hand and I catch the icepack and press it against my cheek firmly. I swallow nervously, and I see Blaine move his hand to the back if his neck looking at his shoes.

"Anything to tell me, Kurt?" he asks patiently his lips pursed lightly. My eyes go wide and I start to stutter under my breath. Then Carole come up behind my dad, putting and hand on his shoulder.

"Let him take his time," Carole tells him looking at me. I mumble a small thank you to her. We slip into silence, and all my friends sit silently.

"I have a boyfriend," I say. My dad looks up at him jaw slacking.

"Uh I think I got that part, Kurt. Why didn't you tell me?" he asks. I study his face, and see hurt.

"I thought that you would be pissed off if you knew I have a boyfriend he's two years older than me," I say. Once it slips out I instantly regret it. His eyes go wide.

"Two years?" he snaps. Carole automatically steps in. "Listen to what else he has to say," she says.

He nods slowly and gestures for me to talk. "Can we go somewhere else?" I ask him. He nods and I look up at Blaine. Then I look at my dad and see the death stare he's directing at Blaine. I swallow my nerves and grab Blaine's arm pulling him with us. My dad follows, and Carole tags along.

We walk silently farther down a hallway and Blaine stops walking when we are farther down the corridor he stops. I turn and look at my dad and say nothing.

"Well?" he asks. I blink at him before opening my mouth.

"There really isn't much to say," I tell him. "It just happened." He looks at me with his brown eyes before looking up and shaking his head.

"You should've just told me, Kurt," I look up at Blaine who stands there awkwardly. Before I continue Eric comes down the stony hallway with Peter. I look at Peter, who seems angry and agitated.

"Kurt follow," he orders. My mouth drops open before I defend myself.

"I'm not a dog," I say. I go to say something else but Blaine cuts me off. "What is this about, Eric?" he asks.

"You do realize we have a policy on no fighting when not in training, right?" Eric says. Blaine stares at him blinking in disbelief.

"He attacked me!" I proclaim.

"That's because YOU DON'T DESERVE IT!" Peter shouts. My hands tighten into fists and I take a step forward, but Blaine places a hand on my shoulder. "Don't," he whispers to me.

"I'll let this slide if you apologize," he says. When I got to pretest he cuts me off abruptly. "**Both **of you."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Peter asks looking at Eric frustrated.

"No I'm not," Eric says. I look at Blaine and all he does is shrug.

"You're apologizing first," I say to Peter. "I am not," he replies coldly. "Yes you are," I say. "Am not," he says again.

"Stop acting like two year olds," Blaine says behind. "Just apologize," he says.

"Of course I need to apologize first," Peter says to Blaine. "I didn't do anything."

"You attacked me!" I shout. Peter's face changes immediately.

"I did not! You're the one with anger issues!" he screams at me.

He lunges at me then and Blaine wraps his arm around my waist pulling me back, Eric doing the same to Peter. It's no use though we both kick and scream loudly trying to get at each other.

"Kurt!" I hear my dad shout. I stop and whip my body around. I look at him closely. I can see the disappointment in his eyes, as he forgets what I was, and looks at what I became. When I turned Eric had already take Peter away.

At first I don't think; I just run.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

When I stop running I find myself at the door to the tattoo parlor. I sigh nervously and crack the door open before poking my head in. "Tori?" I call out her name softly. She stalks out of a room with her black hair flowing off her shoulders, with her beautiful colorful streaks in it randomly. She wipes her hands on a towel before draping it over the side of a chair.

"Kurt!" she says smiling. "What a surprise. What brings you here though? Isn't it visiting day?" she asks me.

"Yeah it is but I have had an idea for a tattoo that I really want," I explain nerves spreading through my stomach.

"Really? And you need it on visiting day because?" she questions, hoping I would finish the sentence.

"I don't know really," I answer. "I just really need to get my mind off something."

"Alright then," she says, smiling and walking over to me. She puts her hands on my shoulders and guides me to the chair. "So what would you like to get today?" she asks me.

I take a deep breath before gaining all the courage I could muster. I tell her what I want and what I picture it as. "Good choice," she says smiling at me. I close my eyes and feel the pinching begin. It's placed on the back of my shoulder and I hiss in slight pain.

"How have you been?" Tori asks me taking my mind off the pain.

"Kinda okay, kinda not," I answer truthfully. I look over my shoulder and see her staring completely focused on the tattoo.

"Have you gotten" she hesitates before bringing herself to say it. "Information?"

I nod lightly before adding on. "Blaine actually told me a lot."

She nods and I sit silent focusing on the slight burn and pinch that works its way over my shoulder. My skin feels cold against the black leather chair and I let my mind float away from my dad, and Peter.

I sit there breathing softly as time slipped by. "Done," Tori says. I push myself up and get off my stomach and sit straight up. I pull my shirt over my head and sit in silent.

"Can you tell me anything? About what you went through and why you are sort of protecting me?" I ask. She looks up at me.

"My brother is," she quickly stops. "_Was, _divergent," she says a sad smile playing at the edge of her lips.

"Was?" I ask my eyebrows rising. She nods slowly.

"He was killed," Is all she tells me. "You should go see your family," she says pulling me out of the chair.

"Tori," I say before she makes me exit and shuts the door in my face. "Well then," I sigh and walk to the bathroom. When I get there I lock the door and slip my shirt off. In black letters a single word makes me smile. The word that is forever etched into my brain. A word that I find myself saying when things get the best of me.

_**Courage. **_

**AN: So I haven't been doing authors notes I get so happy when I finish I completely forget. So please review and tell me what you guys think and any tips or things you may want to see come up. So pleaseeee REVIEWWW! :)**


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